Subject: Activities » Housework

I’ve decided to sell my Hoover… well, it was just collecting dust.

(1967 – ) English actor, writer & comedian
Activities Housework

There’s such a buildup of crud in my oven, there’s only room to bake a single cupcake.

(1917 – 2012) comedian & actress
Activities Housework

A clean house is a sign of a misspent life.

Activities Housework Life Proverbs

I used to live with five straight guys and – ew, the cleaning schedule was 'nope.'

comedian
Housework Men People

It (housework) expands to fill the time available plus half an hour: so obviously it is never finished.

Housework Murphy’s Laws

I used to think about Cindy Crawford; now, I think about leaving dishes in the sink overnight without a war breaking out.

(1965 – 2010) American stand-up comedian & television personality
Housework Marriage Sex

I make no secret of the fact that I would rather lie on a sofa than sweep beneath it.

(1932 – ) British novelist & journalist
Activities Housework

I’ve decided to become gay… not in a sexual way, but I am going to start picking up around the house.

American comedian & actor
Activities Housework

It's better to have loved and lost than do forty pounds of laundry a week.

(1904 – 1989) Spanish surrealist painter
Emotions Housework Love

Housework can't kill you, but why take a chance?

(1917 – 2012) comedian & actress
Activities Housework

Housekeeping ain't no joke.

(1832 – 1888) novelist
Housework Work

I think housework is far more tiring and frightening than hunting is… and yet after hunting we had eggs for tea and were made to rest for hours, but after housework people expect one to go on just as if nothing special had happened.

(1904 – 1973) English novelist & biographer
Housework Work

You don’t get spoiled if you do your own ironing.

(1949 – ) American actress
Activities Housework

The fantasy of every Australian man is to have two women – one cleaning and the other dusting.

Australian comedian & actress
Housework People Women

I am a marvelous housekeeper; every time I leave a man I keep his house.

(1917 – 2016) Hungarian-born American actress
Divorce Housework Marriage

I find apologizing for not having cleaned is easier than cleaning.

(1975 – ) English comedian
Housework

Housework is what a woman does that nobody notices unless she hasn't done it.

(1899 – 1995) humorist
Housework Women Work

How do you know if it's time to wash the dishes and clean your house?… look inside your pants and if you find a penis in there, it's not time.

(1957 – ) British stand-up comedian
Housework Men People Situations

Excuse the mess but we live here.

(1952 – ) comedian, actress & writer
Activities Housework

Best way to get rid of kitchen odors: eat out.

(1917 – 2012) comedian & actress
Eating Food/Drink Housework

Cleaning your house while your kids are still growing is like shoveling the sidewalk before it stops snowing.

(1917 – 2012) comedian & actress
Children Housework People