Subject: Death

Never felt better.

(1911 – 2000) American actor
Last words

I always read the last page of a book first so that if I die before I finish, I will know how it turned out.

(1941 – 2012) American novelist, producer, screenwriter & director
Communication Death Reading/Writing

I've had a hell of a lot of fun and I've enjoyed every minute of it.

(1909 – 1959) Australian-born American actor
Last words

When I die, if the word ‘thong’ appears in the first or second sentence of my obituary, I’ve screwed up.

(1947 — ) American actor, writer, comedian & director
Death Self

I am dying. Please… bring me a toothpick.

(1873 – 1907) French writer
Last words

No! I didn't come here to make a speech. I came here to die.

Cherokee Bill (1876 – 1896) American convicted murderer & outlaw
Last words

They say you shouldn’t say nothin’ about the dead unless it’s good; he’s dead… good!

(1894 – 1975) American comedian
Communication Death Speech

If I had known the difference between the words 'antidote' and 'anecdote,' one of my good friends would still be living.

comedian
Communication Death Health Language

They say such nice things about people at their funerals that it makes me sad to realize that I'm going to miss mine by just a few days.

(1942 – ) humorist & radio broadcaster
Death

Martyr: One who moves along the line of least reluctance to a desired death.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Communication Death Definitions Language

I have to set my pillows one more night… when will this end already?

(1783 – 1859) American author, essayist, biographer & historian
Last words

Is it safe?

(1824-1856) doctor & convicted multiple murderer
Last words

I tried to hang myself with bungee cord… I kept almost dying.

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Death

Death is an acquired trait.

(1935 – ) movie actor, director & comedian
Death

The only difference between death and taxes is that death doesn't get worse every time Congress meets.

(1879 – 1935) humorist & social commentator
Congress Death Government Taxes

There is no satisfaction in hanging a man who does not object to it.

(1856 – 1950) Irish playwright & socialist
Death

An epitaph is a belated advertisement for a line of goods that has been discontinued.

(1876 – 1944) American author, humorist & columnist
Death Epitaphs

The operation was a complete success, but the patient died of something else.

Death Doctors Health

There are some similarities, of course [between Iraq and Vietnam] – death is terrible.

(1946 – ) 43rd U.S. president
Death Misspokements

I don't jog; if I die I want to be sick.

(1922 – 2002) American college basketball coach
Activities Death

You guys doin' that right?

(1953 – 2005) American co-founder of the Crips, a notorious street gang, convicted robber & murderer
Last words