Subject: Emotions

Fun is like life insurance; the older you get, the more it costs.

(1868 – 1930) cartoonist, humorist & journalist
Age Emotions Money Old

What the world really needs is more love and less paperwork.

(1918 – 1990) American actress & singer
Emotions Love Places World

To find out if she really loved me, I hooked her up to a lie detector; and just as I suspected, my machine was broken.

(1982 – ) American author
Emotions Love Situations

There is no reciprocity; men love women, women love children, children love hamsters.

Anna Haycraft (1932 – 2005) English writer & essayist
Children Emotions Love Men Women

I diagnosed my loneliness as premature empty nest syndrome.

(1978 – ) American actress, writer & comedian
Emotions Self

Saving love doesn't bring any interest.

(1893 – 1980) actress, playwright, screenwriter & sex symbol
Emotions Love Money

A man always remembers his first love with special tenderness, but after that he begins to bunch them.

(1880 – 1956) journalist, essayist, editor & satirist
Emotions Intelligence Love Memory

She was as mad as a wet blanket.

(1908 – 1997) German-born teacher, academic & humorist
Anger Emotions Malaprops

Love is not a sprint, it’s a marathon, a relentless pursuit that only ends when she falls into your arms… or hits you with the pepper spray.

(1980 – ) American actor, comedian & musician
Love TV/Movie Quotes

She was always crying; in fact, she wept so much she made everybody's corns ache.

(1886 – 1969) American journalist & humorist
Emotions

I quit because I was in the hospital and I realized that I truly believed that laughter was the best medicine, but it turns out penicillin works a hell of a lot better.

(1971 – ) American comedian, actor, television host & former physician
Doctors Emotions Health Laughter

Nobody ever had to steal Georgie's affections – he gave them away at the drop of a skirt.

(1896 – 1996) comedian, actor & entertainer
Emotions Sex

I hope they bury me near a straight man.

(1890 – 1977) comedian, actor & television host
Death Emotions

If you can’t help out with a little money, at least give a sympathetic groan.

Emotions

Once a woman has given you her heart you can never get rid of the rest of her body.

(1664 – 1726) English architect & dramatist
Emotions Love Sex Women

Love: Two minds without a single thought.

(1896 – 1949) American dramatist
Emotions Love

It's not that I'm afraid to die, I just don't want to be there when it happens.

(1935 – ) movie actor, director & comedian
Death Emotions Fear

Love: Oceans of emotions surrounded by expanses of expenses.

Definitions Emotions Love

The quickest way to a man's heart really is through his stomach, because then you don't have to chop through that pesky rib cage.

(1980 – ) cartoonist
Body Emotions

Before I met my husband, I'd never fallen in love, though I'd stepped in it a few times.

(1953 – ) comedian, dancer & writer
Emotions Husbands Love Marriage

No woman ever falls in love with a man unless she has a better opinion of him than he deserves.

(1853 – 1937) journalist, writer & editor
Emotions Love Men People Women