Subject: Conflict

War does not determine who is right – only who is left.

(1856 – 1950) Irish playwright & socialist
Conflict People War

One failed attempt at a shoe bomb and we all take off our shoes at the airport; thirty-one school shootings since Columbine and no change in our regulation of guns.

(1977 – ) British political comedian & television host
Arms Conflict TV/Movie Quotes

Every fight is a food fight when you’re a cannibal.

(1973 – ) American comedian
Conflict Fights Food/Drink

My mom was a ventriloquist and she always was throwing her voice; for ten years I thought the dog was telling me to kill my father.

(1961 – ) American stand-up comedian
Communication Family Fathers Killing Mothers Speech

Mines are equal opportunity weapons.

Arms Military Murphy’s Laws

All I know is, finally I get to kill somebody.

American actor
Conflict Killing TV/Movie Quotes

Abscond: To move in a mysterious way, commonly with the property of another.

Crime Definitions

Automatic weapons – aren’t.

Arms Military Murphy’s Laws

If you are going to tell people the truth, be funny or they will kill you.

(1906 – 2002) Austrian journalist, filmmaker, screenwriter & producer
Communication Honesty Killing Truth

We kill people who kill people because killing people is wrong.

Conflict Killing

You break into my house… my wife will shoot you, and then spend thirty minutes telling you why she shot you.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
Arms Speech Things

The best ally you can have in breaking up a street fight is a grandmother.

(John Bloom) (1953 – ) American film critic, writer & actor
Conflict Family Fights

I live in a neighborhood so bad that you can get shot while getting shot.

(1965 – ) comedian, actor, screenwriter, television producer & director
Conflict Places

Sometime they'll give a war and nobody will come.

Carl Sandburg (1878 – 1967) biographer & poet
Conflict People War

If I play badly I’ll pick a fight in the third, just to get into a fight. I’ll break a guy’s leg to win, I don’t care. Afterward I say, ‘Yeah, all right I played badly, but I won the fight so who gives a damn.'

Canadian hockey player
Conflict Fights Hockey Sports

The most dangerous thing in the combat zone is an officer with a map.

Military Murphy’s Laws War

If hockey fights were fake, I'd be in more of them.

professional hockey player
Fights Hockey Sports

Prisoner serving 2,000-year sentence could face more time

Crime Headlines

Here's to Johnny quite a guy. Very sad he had to die. All was well could not be better, Till he wrote my girl a letter.

Conflict Epitaphs Girlfriends Killing

Don't lie, steal, or cheat unnecessarily.

Characteristics Conflict Honesty Murphy’s Laws

Marriage is nature's way of keeping us from fighting with strangers.

(1927 – 2004) American comedian & actor
Conflict Fights Marriage