Subject: Sports

If you can’t make the putts and can’t get the man in from second on the bottom of the ninth, you’re not going to win enough football games in this league, and that’s the problem we had today.

football coach
Football Misspokements Sports

Most of his home runs were hit on artificial turf.

(1925 – 2015) baseball player, coach & manager
Baseball Yogi-isms

The stopwatch has stopped. It's up to God and the referee now. The referee is Pat Horan. God is God.

Irish Gaelic games commentator
God Sports

Jay Bell is 0-for-6 in this series with 10 homers and 52 RBIs.

(1922 – 2014) American baseball player & announcer
Baseball Misspokements Sports

Optimistically, you hope someday you’ll be in a magazine. Of course, your mom hopes it’s Sports Illustrated or something like that.

American hockey player & coach
Hockey Sports

The sun doesn’t shine on the same dog’s butt every day but we sure didn’t expect a total eclipse.

American football player, coach & college athletics administrator
Misspokements Sports

On a recent survey, 80 percent of golfers admitted cheating… the other 20 percent lied.

(1941 – ) poet, author, editor & anthologist
Activities Golf Sports

I’ve never seen a guy on the DL [Disabled List] with pulled fat.

professional baseball player
Baseball Misspokements Sports

The hockey lockout of 1994-1995 has been settled. They have stopped bickering… and can now get down to some serious bloodshed!

(1963 – ) television host & comedian
Hockey Sports

Since my kids were born, I put on a shield. I wanted to keep on seeing them.

Russian hockey player
Hockey Sports

I don’t care what the tape says… I didn’t say it.

football coach
Misspokements Sports

Some quiet guys are inwardly outgoing.

(1922 – 2014) American baseball player & announcer
Baseball Misspokements People Sports

A puck is a hard rubber disc that hockey players strike when they can’t hit one another. 

(1909 – 1973) American sports journalist
Hockey Sports

Jerry's a nice kid, but so's my wife… and she's no quarterback.

(1923 – 2001) American football coach
Football Sports

A lot of horses get distracted; it’s just human nature.

Horse trainer
Misspokements Sports

I just wrap my arms around the whole backfield and peel 'em off one by one until I get to the ball carrier… him I keep.

professional football player
Football Sports

I’m really no different than anybody else; except that sometimes I get my name in the paper.

Canadian professional hockey player
Hockey People Self Sports

That’s Hendrick’s 19th home run; one more and he reaches double figures.

(1924 – 2014) American baseball player & announcer
Baseball Misspokements Sports

I accept the fact that I'm going to miss it sometimes. I just hope I miss it where I can find it.

American professional golfer
Golf Sports

There are rough players and there are dirty players. I'm rough and dirty.

Slovak-born Canadian hockey player
Hockey Sports

Baseball is the only major sport that appears backwards in a mirror.

(1937 – 2008) stand-up comedian, social critic, actor & author
Baseball Sports