Subject: Miscellaneous

Hold your horses

Miscellaneous

Most people don’t realize that two large pieces of coral painted brown and attached to the skull with common wood screws can make a child look like a deer.

Miscellaneous

He’s shorter than a mouse hole.

Miscellaneous

It’s got tits or tires, you’re gonna have trouble with it.

Miscellaneous

He’d complain if you hung him with a new rope.

Miscellaneous

He’d scare a horse from his oats.

Miscellaneous

I’ve been in Who’s Who, and I know what’s what, but it’ll be the first time I ever made the dictionary.

(1893 – 1980) actress, playwright, screenwriter & sex symbol
Miscellaneous

Bowed up like a Halloween cat

Miscellaneous

He’s as happy as if he had good sense.

Miscellaneous

You’re like the dog that caught the car.

Miscellaneous

Uglier than a burnt stump

Miscellaneous

Instead of a bicycle built for two, what about no kinds of bicycles at all for anybody, anymore?… there, are you happy now?

Miscellaneous

Lost as a goose in a snowstorm

Miscellaneous

Dumber ‘n a sack of wet mice

Miscellaneous

I spoke to her and she didn’t say pea turkey squat.

Miscellaneous

“I’ve grown fat on the contents of charity packages,” said Tom carefully.

Miscellaneous

I’ll cloud up and rain all over you.

Miscellaneous

He’s country as a bowl of grits.

Miscellaneous

How do you write ‘zero’ in Roman Numerals?

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Miscellaneous

Just because a chicken has wings doesn’t mean it can fly.

Miscellaneous

It’s 100% easier not to do things than to do them.

(1982 – ) American comedian, actor, writer & producer
Miscellaneous