Subject: Intelligence

Education is what remains after one has forgotten everything one learned in school.

(1879 – 1955) German-born physicist
Education Learning Memory School

We must respect the other fellow's religion, but only in the sense and to the extent that we respect his theory that his wife is beautiful and his children smart.

(1880 – 1956) journalist, essayist, editor & satirist
Appearance Characteristics Children Intelligence Religion Wives

When an error has been detected and corrected, it will be found to have been correct in the first place

Corollary: After the correction has been found in error, it will be impossible to fit the original quantity back into the equation.

Ideas Intelligence Mistakes Murphy’s Laws

He has the lucidity which is the byproduct of a fundamentally sterile mind.

(1897 – 1960) Welsh labor leader & politician
Insults Intelligence

Couldn’t find his rear with his hands in his back pockets

Expressions Fools Intelligence Stupidity

Don't worry about people stealing an idea; if it's original, you will have to ram it down their throats.

(1900 – 1973) computer pioneer
Ideas Intelligence

An intellectual is a man who doesn't know how to park a bike.

(1918 – 1996) U.S. vice president & politician
Intelligence People

Knowledge is knowing that a tomato is a fruit; wisdom is knowing not to use it in a fruit salad.

Intelligence

I am patient with stupidity but not with those who are proud of it.

(1887 – 1964) English biographer, critic, novelist & poet
Intelligence Stupidity

My girlfriend said she wanted me to dominate her; so I said, “OK, let’s play Scrabble.”

(1978 – ) American stand-up comedian
Intelligence Sex

Some scientists claim that hydrogen, because it is so plentiful, is the basic building block of the universe; I dispute that… I say there is more stupidity than hydrogen, and that is the basic building block of the universe.

(1940 – 1993) composer, guitarist, record producer & film director
Intelligence Stupidity

Senility: The pleasantly rueful experience of forgetting what we’ve forgotten.

Age Definitions Intelligence Memory Old

The best way to predict the future is to invent it.

(1940 – ) computer scientist
Future Ideas Intelligence Time

Nothing fixes a thing so intensely in the memory as the wish to forget it.

Intelligence Memory

If all economists were laid end to end, they would not reach a conclusion.

(1922 – ) American economist
Intelligence Occupations Work

Drinking makes such fools of people, and people are such fools to begin with it's just compounding the felony.

(1889 – 1945) actor, author & humorist
Alcohol Food/Drink Fools Intelligence

No one has ever had an idea in a dress suit.

(1891 – 1941) Canadian physician & physiologist
Appearance Clothing Ideas Intelligence

Although it is not true that all conservatives are stupid people, it is true that most stupid people are conservative.

(1806-1873) British philosopher
Beliefs Government Intelligence Opinion Stupidity

I remember when Grandpa’s memories started to go; it was the day I caught him urinating with the door open… which is not a huge deal, but it’s annoying when I’m trying to drive.

Canadian comedian & actor
Intelligence Memory Relationships Situations

Grown-ups never understand anything by themselves, and it is tiresome for children to be always and forever explaining things to them.

(1900 – 1944) French aristocrat, writer, poet & pioneering aviator
Children Family Intelligence Parents

If I look confused it is because I am thinking.

(1879 – 1974) film producer
Appearance Intelligence Misspokements Speech Thinking