Subject: Activities » Housework (Page 3)

I’m eighteen years behind on my ironing.

(1917 – 2012) comedian & actress
Activities Housework

Housework, if you do it right, will kill you.

(1927 – 1996) columnist & humorist
Activities Housework

Show me a man who lives alone and has a perpetually clean kitchen, and 8 times out of 9 I’ll show you a man with detestable spiritual qualities.

(1920 – 1994) German-born author & poet
Beliefs Housework

I used to live with five straight guys and – ew, the cleaning schedule was 'nope.'

comedian
Housework Men People

Men – because of a tragic flaw – cannot see dirt until there is enough of it to support agriculture.

(1947 – ) American columnist & humorist
Housework Men People

You make the beds, you wash the dishes and six months later you have to start all over again.

(1935 – 2014) American comedian, television personality, writer & director
Housework Things Time Work

It (housework) expands to fill the time available plus half an hour: so obviously it is never finished.

Housework Murphy’s Laws

You know it’s time to do the laundry when you dry off with a sneaker.

(1969 – ) comedian & actor
Housework Work

The day I worry about cleaning my house is the day Sears comes out with a riding vacuum cleaner.

(1952 – ) comedian, actress & writer
Housework Work

There is always more dirty laundry than clean laundry.

Housework Murphy’s Laws

I used to think about Cindy Crawford; now, I think about leaving dishes in the sink overnight without a war breaking out.

(1965 – 2010) American stand-up comedian & television personality
Housework Marriage Sex

Keeping house is as unpleasant and filthy as coal mining, and the pay's a lot worse.

(1947 – ) author, humorist & satirist
Activities Housework

My mother was so house proud that when my father got up to sleepwalk she had the bed made by the time he got back.

(1919 – 1985) Scottish comedian & actor
Family Housework Mothers