Subject: Activities (Page 10)

Tell him I’ve been too f**king busy – or vice versa.

(1893 – 1967) writer, humorist & poet
Activities Sex Situations Time

Housework is what a woman does that nobody notices unless she hasn't done it.

(1899 – 1995) humorist
Housework Women Work

A mediocre player will sink to the level of his or her opposition.

Games Murphy’s Laws Sports

In order to live off a garden, you practically have to live in it.

(1868 – 1930) cartoonist, humorist & journalist
Activities

I get enough exercise just pushing my luck.

Activities Characteristics Exercise

Insomnia: contagious disease often transmitted from babies to parents.

Activities Definitions Sleep

There are two types of people in this world, good and bad; the good sleep better, but the bad seem to enjoy the waking hours much more.

(1935 – ) movie actor, director & comedian
People Situations Sleep

Boxing is a great exercise… as long as you can yell 'cut' whenever you want to.

(1946 – ) American actor
Activities Boxing Entertainment Exercise Film Sports

I used to dread getting older because I thought I would not be able to do all the things I wanted to do, but now that I am older I find that I don't want to do them.

(1879 – 1964) British politician
Activities Age Old

I married a German; every night I dress up as Poland and he invades me.

(1945 – ) singer, actress & comedian
Activities Conflict Places Sex

People who say they sleep like a baby usually don't have one.


Situations Sleep

I'm not a vegetarian, but I eat animals who are.

(1890 – 1977) comedian, actor & television host
Activities Animals Food/Drink

I was sleeping the other night, alone, thanks to the exterminator.

(1956 – ) American comedian
Activities Animals Sleep

I hate when people drive like me.

(1966 – 2011) American stand-up comedian
Autos Driving Situations Things

Most people are so lazy, they don't even exercise good judgement!

fictional mascot and cover boy of Mad, an American humor magazine
Characteristics Exercise Work

Sometimes something worth doing is worth overdoing.

(1947 – ) comedian & television host
Activities Characteristics

If God had really intended man to fly, He’d make it easier to get to the airport.

(1925 – 2013) comedian & actor
Activities Travel

Women: You can't live with them, and you can't get them to dress up in a skimpy little Nazi costume and beat you with a warm squash or something.

(1956 – ) American comedian
Activities Clothing Sex Things Women

One should always play fairly when one has the winning cards.

(1854 – 1900) Irish dramatist, novelist & poet
Activities Characteristics Games Honesty

A Smith and Wesson beats four aces.

Arms Games Murphy’s Laws Things

Bridge: A game which gives women something to try to think about while they are talking.

Activities Definitions Games