Subject: Activities » Shopping (Page 2)

Scientists are trying to invent Viagra for women. It’s been along for years… it’s called cash.

(1962 – ) American comedian & actor
Activities People Shopping Women

Thank God we’re living in a country where the sky’s the limit, the stores are open late and you can shop in bed thanks to television.

(1935 – 2014) American comedian, television personality, writer & director
Activities Shopping

Shopping is probably the most underrated contact sport in the world.

(1927 – 1996) columnist & humorist
Activities Shopping

The customer is always ripe.

Activities Murphy’s Laws Shopping

It’s easy to tell when you’ve got a bargain – it doesn’t fit.

Activities Clothing Murphy’s Laws Shopping

The other line moves faster.

Activities Murphy’s Laws Shopping

Our culture teaches us to buy things we don't need, with money we don't have, to impress people we don't like.

(1946 – 2007) American entrepreneur
Activities Shopping

If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Activities Shopping Things

Bargain: anything a customer thinks a store is losing money on.

(1868 – 1930) cartoonist, humorist & journalist
Money Shopping

There is only one thing for a man to do who is married to a woman who enjoys spending money, and that is to enjoy earning it.

(1853 – 1937) journalist, writer & editor
Husbands Marriage Shopping Wives

Suzanne: I never use catalogs. I’d rather go in the store and see all the salespeople groveling and sucking up to you.

Julia: Pardon me, I never knew they were so solicitous at the K-Mart.

(1939 – 2010) American actress
Activities Shopping TV/Movie Quotes

I'm not embarrassed going to a drug store anymore to buy a condom; although, the woman behind the counter said, 'Save your money; buy a lottery ticket.'

(1955 – ) American stand-up comedian
Shopping Situations

People who say that money can't buy happiness just don't know where to shop.

(1958 – ) Australian author
Emotions Happiness Money People Shopping

If you need n items of anything, you will have n – 1 in stock.

Murphy’s Laws Shopping Things

I’ve read some of your modern free verse and wonder who set it free.

(1882 – 1942) American actor
Communication Reading/Writing Shopping

Never try to guess your wife's size. Just buy her anything marked ‘petite’ and hold on to the receipt.

Appearance Body Clothing Murphy’s Laws Shopping

She took my son to Costco, bought 14 pounds of Oreos – and saved us money somehow.

American stand-up comedian
Marriage Money Shopping Wives

I went to a general store, but they wouldn’t let me buy anything specific.

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Activities Shopping Things

The gifts you buy your wife are never as appropriate as the gifts your neighbor buys his wife.

Husbands Murphy’s Laws Shopping Wives

Marrying a man is like buying something you've been admiring for a long time in a shop window; you may love it when you get it home, but it doesn't always go with everything else in the house.

(1922 – 2003) author & playwright
Appearance Clothing Marriage Shopping

If you go to Bed Bath & Beyond without a coupon, people will wonder if you’re OK.

(1964 – 2014) American actor, Broadway performer & stand-up comedian
Activities Shopping