Subject: Age » Old (Page 12)

The older you get, the higher your underwear – get like rings on a tree; you're 80-90 years old – your breasts are inside them.

stand-up comedian, actor, writer & producer
Age Appearance Body Clothing Old

She is so old… she was the waitress at the last supper.

Age Exaggerations Old

I have reached an age when, if someone tells me to wear socks, I don't have to.

(1879 – 1955) German-born physicist
Age Clothing Old

Larry King is so old, he's actually one of the Jews that killed Christ.

(1978 – ) American writer & stand-up comedian
Age Old People

She is so old… she used to baby-sit Jesus.

Age Exaggerations Old

Most people my age are dead at the present time.

(1890 – 1975) American baseball manager
Age Death Life Misspokements Old People Time

Senility: A cleansing of the mental blackboard shortly before class is dismissed.

Age Definitions Old

Oh, this your wife, huh? A lovely lady. Hey baby, you must’ve been something before electricity.

(1921 – 2004) stand-up comedian & actor
Age Insults Old TV/Movie Quotes

Women are as old as they feel and men are old when they lose their feelings.

(1893 – 1980) actress, playwright, screenwriter & sex symbol
Age Men Old People Women

After thirty, a body has a mind of its own.

(1945 – ) singer, actress & comedian
Age Appearance Body Old

Age is something that doesn't matter, unless you are a cheese.

(1884 – 1970) American actress
Age Old

I’d like to grow very old as slowly as possible.

(1907 - 1990) American theatrical producer
Age Old Time

I'm so old they've cancelled my blood type.

(1903 – 2003) English-born American comedian & actor
Age Old

There is nothing so aggravating as a fresh boy who is too old to ignore and too young to kick.

(1868 – 1930) cartoonist, humorist & journalist
Age Old People

The older one grows, the more one likes indecency.

(1882 – 1941) English novelist, essayist, publisher & feminist
Age Old

Old age is when you resent the swimsuit issue of Sports Illustrated because there are fewer articles to read.

(1896 – 1996) comedian, actor & entertainer
Age Old

You know you’re getting old when you start watching golf on TV and enjoying it.

(1953 – ) American comedian, actor, voice artist, & columnist
Age Entertainment Golf Old Television

In Los Angeles, by the time you’re 35, you’re older than most of the buildings.

(1941 – 2012) American novelist, producer, screenwriter & director
Age Old Places

Regardless of their age, most folks are not as old as they hope to be.

Age Old

Tommy John is so old, he uses Absorbine Senior.

(1952 – ) American sportscaster
Age Baseball Old Sports

Your modern teenager is not about to listen to advice from an old person, defined as a person who remembers when there was no Velcro.

Age Intelligence Old Young