Subject: Age » Old (Page 3)

Aging seems to be the only available way to live a long life.

Age Life Old

People are living longer than ever before, a phenomenon undoubtedly made necessary by the 30-year mortgage.

(1926 – ) newspaper columnist
Age Life Old

First you forget names, then you forget faces… next you forget to pull your zipper up and finally, you forget to pull it down.

(1896 – 1996) comedian, actor & entertainer
Age Intelligence Memory Old

I knew her before she was a virgin.

(1906 – 1972) pianist, composer, author, comedian & actor
Age Old

She is so old… her dreams are in black and white.

Age Exaggerations Old

The only difference between friends and lovers is about four minutes.

writer, website creator
Friends Old People

Most people my age are dead at the present time.

(1890 – 1975) American baseball manager
Age Death Life Misspokements Old People Time

Centenarian: A person who has lived to be one hundred years old. He never smoked or he smoked all his life. He used whiskey for eighty years or he never used it. He was a vegetarian or he wasn’t a vegetarian.

Age Definitions Old

Retire? … I'm going to stay in show business until I'm the only one left.

(1896 – 1996) comedian, actor & entertainer
Age Entertainment Old Work

When I was a boy the Dead Sea was only sick.

(1896 – 1996) comedian, actor & entertainer
Age Health Old Places

You know you’re getting old when you buy a sexy sheer nightgown and don’t know anyone who can see through it.

(1935 – 2014) American comedian, television personality, writer & director
Age Old

You know you're old if they have discontinued your blood type.

(1917 – 2012) comedian & actress
Age Health Old Science/Weather

I was getting dressed and a peeping Tom looked in the window, took a look and pulled down the shade.

(1935 – 2014) American comedian, television personality, writer & director
Age Appearance Body Old

That dame is older than the Continental Shelf!

(1944 – ) American actor, director & producer
Age Old TV/Movie Quotes

Old age is ready to undertake tasks that youth shirked because they would take too long.

(1890 – 1977) comedian, actor & television host
Age Old

A person is always startled when he hears himself seriously called an old man for the first time.

(1841 – 1935) American jurist & Supreme Court justice
Age Old

Sometimes I feel that I’m not just aging… I’m decomposing.

(1949 – ) American federal judge
Age Old

Good taste is the worst vice ever invented.

(1887 – 1964) English biographer, critic, novelist & poet
Characteristics Old Opinion

A man's only as old as the woman he feels.

(1890 – 1977) comedian, actor & television host
Age Men Old People Sex Women

If you're 19 and you stay up all night, it's like a victory, like you've beat the night, but, if you're over 30, then that sun is like God's flashlight.

(1953 – ) American comedian, actor, voice artist, & columnist
Age Old Situations Young

I’m at the age where I have to find my hearing aid to ask where my glasses are.

(1927 – ) magician & comedy writer
Age Old