Subject: Age » Old (Page 3)

There is still no cure for the common birthday.

(1921 – ) U.S. senator (Ohio) Marine Corps pilot & astronaut
Age Health Old

As we grow older, our bodies get shorter and our anecdotes longer.

(1887 – 1948) American journalist & humorist
Age Communication Old

Centenarian: A person who has lived to be one hundred years old. He never smoked or he smoked all his life. He used whiskey for eighty years or he never used it. He was a vegetarian or he wasn’t a vegetarian.

Age Definitions Old

Threescore years and ten is enough; if a man can’t suffer all the misery he wants in that time, he must be numb.

(1818 – 1885) humorist
Age Life Old

Children are a great comfort in your old age… and they help you reach it faster too.

Age Children Family Old

I used to dread getting older because I thought I would not be able to do all the things I wanted to do, but now that I am older I find that I don't want to do them.

(1879 – 1964) British politician
Activities Age Old

She said she was approaching forty, and I couldn't help wondering from what direction.

(1903 – 2003) English-born American comedian & actor
Age Old

It was tough growing up in Florida because all my friends were retired.

(1959 – ) American comedian, comedy writer, actor & author
Age Friends Old People Places Young

Senility: The pleasantly rueful experience of forgetting what we’ve forgotten.

Age Definitions Intelligence Memory Old

You’ll have to ask somebody older than me.

(1883 – 1983) American composer, lyricist & pianist
Age Old Sex

I said to my husband, ‘My boobs have gone, my stomach’s gone, say something nice about my legs;’ he said, ‘Blue goes with everything.’

(1935 – 2014) American comedian, television personality, writer & director
Age Appearance Old

The comfort of turning 49 is the realization that you are now too old to die young.

Age Death Murphy’s Laws Old

I told my doctor I wanna stop aging, he gave me a gun!

(1921 – 2004) stand-up comedian & actor
Age Doctors Health Old Things

A man's only as old as the woman he feels.

(1890 – 1977) comedian, actor & television host
Age Men Old People Sex Women

You know you’re getting older when you don’t care where your wife goes, just so you don’t have to go along

Age Marriage Old Wives

I knew her before she was a virgin.

(1906 – 1972) pianist, composer, author, comedian & actor
Age Old

I may be forty, but every morning when I get up, I feel like a twenty-year-old… unfortunately there’s never one around.

(1927 – ) magician & comedy writer
Age Old

Do not worry about avoiding temptation; as you grow older it will avoid you.

(1911 – 1999) comedian, author & columnist
Age Old

The trick is growing up without growing old.

(1890 – 1975) American baseball manager
Age Life Old

Old age is the most unexpected of all the things that can happen to a man.

(1894 – 1961) author, cartoonist & humorist
Age Old People Situations

We cherish our friends not for their ability to amuse us, but for our to amuse them.

(1903 – 1966) English writer
Friends Old People