Subject: Age » Old (Page 4)

The best tunes are played on the oldest fiddles.

Age Old

At eighty-eight how do you feel when getting up in the morning? … Amazed!

(1881 – 1973) German economist
Age Old

As I get older I'm going to hear "You look great" a lot less than I'm going to hear "You look sick.”

American stand-up comedian
Age Appearance Health Old

I’m at the age where I have to find my hearing aid to ask where my glasses are.

(1927 – ) magician & comedy writer
Age Old

The young have aspirations that never come to pass, the old have remembrances of what never happened.

(1870 – 1916) British writer
Age Old Young

The worst feature of a new baby is its mother’s singing.

(1868 – 1930) cartoonist, humorist & journalist
Children Family Mothers Old

A man's only as old as the woman he feels.

(1890 – 1977) comedian, actor & television host
Age Men Old People Sex Women

The years that a woman subtracts from her age are not lost… they are added to the ages of other women.


(1499 – 1566) French noblewoman & prominent courtier
Age Old People Women

Getting old is when a narrow waist and a broad mind change places!

fictional mascot and cover boy of Mad, an American humor magazine
Age Appearance Body Old

When you become senile, you won't know it.

(1937 – ) comedian & television actor
Age Health Memory Old

If you want to be adored by your peers and have standing ovations wherever you go – live to be over ninety.

(1887 – 1995) American theater produce, director & playwright, screenwriter & film director
Age Old

As I understand President Bush's Medicare plan, it provides for unlimited coverage for anyone over 72 whose parents can pass the physical.

(1932 – ) American political satirist & comedian
Age Government Health Old

When men reach their sixties and retire they go to pieces; women just go on cooking.


Age Men Old People Women

Old age is like everything else; to make a success of it, you’ve got to start young.

(1899 – 1987) American dancer, choreographer, singer, musician & actor
Age Old

Now that I am sixty, I see why the idea of elder wisdom has passed from currency.

(1932 – 2009) author, poet & critic
Age Intelligence Old Wisdom

I’ve been playing the game so long that my handicap is in Roman numerals.

(1903 – 2003) English-born American comedian & actor
Activities Age Golf Old Sports Time

I didn’t see it [old age] coming — it hit me from the rear.

(1917 – 2012) comedian & actress
Age Old

What's the advantage of having a kid at 49?… you can both be in diapers at the same time?

stand-up comedian
Age Children Old

Wrinkled Was Not One of the Things I Wanted to Be When I Grew Up

Age Appearance Old Signs

Sex at eighty-four is terrific, especially the one in the winter.

(1908 – 2002) comedian, radio & television actor
Age Old Sex

I'm in a restaurant one time, we go to the men's room – my grandfather was standing by the condom machine going, 'Hey, this gum has got no flavor.'

American comedian & actor
Age Old