Subject: Age » Old (Page 9)

You know you’re getting older when you don’t care where your wife goes, just so you don’t have to go along

Age Marriage Old Wives

When I turned two I was really anxious, because I'd doubled my age in a year, and I thought, if this keeps up, by the time I'm six I'll be ninety.

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Age Old Young

The only good thing about [aging] is you’re not dead.

(1905 –1984) American playwright
Age Old

The years that a woman subtracts from her age are not lost… they are added to the ages of other women.


(1499 – 1566) French noblewoman & prominent courtier
Age Old People Women

I don’t plan to grow old gracefully; I plan to have face-lifts until my ears meet.

(1953 – ) comedian, dancer & writer
Age Appearance Body Old

As I understand President Bush's Medicare plan, it provides for unlimited coverage for anyone over 72 whose parents can pass the physical.

(1932 – ) American political satirist & comedian
Age Government Health Old

I've only got one wrinkle and I'm sitting on it.

(1875 – 1997) French, 120 year old woman
Age Appearance Body Old

That dame is older than the Continental Shelf!

(1944 – ) American actor, director & producer
Age Old TV/Movie Quotes

She is such a good friend that she would throw all her acquaintances into the water for the pleasure of fishing them out again.

(1754 – 1838) French prime minister & diplomat
Friends Old People

You're never too old to become younger.

(1893 – 1980) actress, playwright, screenwriter & sex symbol
Age Old

If you live long enough, the venerability factor creeps in; first, you get accused of things you never did, and later, credited for virtues you never had.

(1907 – 1989) American writer
Age Characteristics Old

At my age flowers scare me.

(1896 – 1996) comedian, actor & entertainer
Age Emotions Fear Old

A true friend is one who overlooks your failures and tolerates your success!

(1926 – ) newspaper columnist
Failure Friends Old People Success

There is still no cure for the common birthday.

(1921 – ) U.S. senator (Ohio) Marine Corps pilot & astronaut
Age Health Old

You can live to be a hundred if you give up all the things that make you want to live to be a hundred.

(1935 – ) movie actor, director & comedian
Age Old

Ask anybody over 30 – if they tell you they have more than 10 friends, you know they’re counting co-workers.

American comedian & television host
Age Friends Old People

I don't need drugs anymore, thank God; I can get the same effect just by standing up real fast.

(1946 – ) American comedian, actor & voice actor
Age Drugs Old

When we’re young, we want to change the world… when we’re old, we want to change the young.

book publisher
Age Old

Eighty is a wonderful age… especially if you’re ninety.

(1900 – 1973) American journalist & editor
Age Old

The worst feature of a new baby is its mother’s singing.

(1868 – 1930) cartoonist, humorist & journalist
Children Family Mothers Old

Old age is the most unexpected of all the things that can happen to a man.

(1894 – 1961) author, cartoonist & humorist
Age Old People Situations