Subject: Age (Page 20)

Being young is not having any money; being young is not minding not having any money

(1928 – ) British journalist, writer & columnist
Age Money Young

If you want to recapture your youth, just cut off his allowance.

(1919 – 2006) American comedian & actor
Age Old Young

I was born when my dad was 50; it’s weird growing up with a dad that much older than you… we’d go to the movies, we’re both getting discounts.

(1970 –) American stand-up comedian
Age Family Fathers Old Young

My friend just got a trophy wife… must not have been first place.

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Age

What can you say when your husband says: “You can’t expect me to remember your birthday, when you never look any older.”

Age Old

Despite his infirmities, Strom Thurmond showed up to work every day and did not miss a Senate vote in his final year, though no one is sure if a shouted "Bingo!" counted as a yea or a nay.

(1962 – ) American political satirist, writer, television host & comedian
Age Government Insults Old

The older I get, the better I used to be.

(1942 – ) American professional golfer
Age Golf Old Sports

When you are eight years old, nothing is any of your business.

(1923 – 1966) stand-up comedian, writer, social critic & satirist
Age Young

To find out a girl’s faults, praise her to her girl friends.

(1706 – 1790) American statesman, author, scientist & inventor
Characteristics Friends Old People Women

She's all done up like a well-kept grave.

(1880 – 1946) comedian, actor, juggler & writer
Age Appearance Insults Old

The best years are the forties; after fifty a man begins to deteriorate, but in the forties he is at the maximum of his villainy.

(1880 – 1956) journalist, essayist, editor & satirist
Age Characteristics Life

If you want to know how old a woman is, ask her sister-in-law.

(1853 – 1937) journalist, writer & editor
Age People Women

I’ve traveled a long way and some of the roads weren’t paved.

(1879 – 1935) humorist & social commentator
Age Appearance Body Old

I made wine out of raisins so I wouldn't have to wait for it to age.

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Age Alcohol Food/Drink Time

Retirement at sixty-five is ridiculous; when I was sixty-five, I still had pimples.

(1896 – 1996) comedian, actor & entertainer
Age Work

You are 32, you are rapidly approaching the age when your body, whether it embarrasses you or not, begins to embarrass other people.

English author, actor, humorist & playwright
Age Appearance Body

The moment you're born you're done for.

1867 – 1931) English novelist
Age

By the time a man is wise enough to watch his step, he's too old to go anywhere.

(1948 – ) comedian, actor, writer, producer & film director
Age Old

A friend who is near and dear may in time become as useless as a relative.

(1672 – 1719) English essasyist, poet & politician
Age Friends People

The older I grow the more I listen to people who don’t talk much.

Age Communication Old

We've had bad luck with our kids… they've all grown up.

(1890 – 1957) author & journalist
Age Children People