Subject: Age (Page 7)

Old Age: When you find yourself using one bend-over to pick up two things.

Age Definitions Old

I’ve traveled a long way and some of the roads weren’t paved.

(1879 – 1935) humorist & social commentator
Age Appearance Body Old

Children are a great comfort in your old age… and they help you reach it faster too.

Age Children Family Old

She is so old… she was the waitress at the last supper.

Age Exaggerations Old

The best way to get most husbands to do something is to suggest that perhaps they're too old to do it.

(1931 – 2005) American actor
Age Men Old People

I don’t plan to grow old gracefully; I plan to have face-lifts until my ears meet.

(1953 – ) comedian, dancer & writer
Age Appearance Body Old

Middle Age: That time of life when you'd rather not have a good time than recover from it. 

Age Definitions

I don't need drugs anymore, thank God; I can get the same effect just by standing up real fast.

(1946 – ) American comedian, actor & voice actor
Age Drugs Old

She said she was approaching forty, and I couldn't help wondering from what direction.

(1903 – 2003) English-born American comedian & actor
Age Old

Old age is the most unexpected of all the things that can happen to a man.

(1894 – 1961) author, cartoonist & humorist
Age Old People Situations

Old age is like learning a new profession; and not one of your own choosing.

(1907 – ) French-born American historian of ideas & culture
Age Old

Even when I was a kid, my imaginary friend would play with the kid across the street.

(1975 – ) American stand-up comedian & television host
Age Friends People Self

Some folks as they grow older grow wise, but most folks simply grow stubborner.

(1818 – 1885) humorist
Age Old Wisdom

After 60, all of us belong to the weaker sex.

(1935 – ) movie actor, director & comedian
Age Old

Forty: The most difficult age for a woman to pass; it often takes years.

Age Definitions

Middle age is when your old classmates are so grey and wrinkled and bald they don't recognize you.

(1898 – 1971) American humorist
Age Appearance

The young are generally full of revolt, and are often pretty revolting about it.

(1913 – 1983) journalist & author
Age Characteristics Young

The boat was so old; it must have been launched when Long John Silver had two legs and an egg on his shoulder.

(1919 – 1985) Scottish comedian & actor
Age Things

I’m from Chicago, but I pay child support in Seattle; I’m just kidding – I don’t pay child support.

(1975 – ) American comedian, actor & writer
Age Children Family Marriage Places

The older you get the stronger the wind gets… and it's always in your face.

(1940 – ) professional golfer
Golf Old Science/Weather Sports

After the age of 80, you seem to be having breakfast every day.

(1907 – 2005) was an English poet & playwright
Age Old