Subject: Animals (Page 21)

Any man who hates dogs and babies can’t be all bad.

(1908 – 1997) German-born teacher, academic & humorist
Animals Dogs Emotions People

I never leave a dog alone in a car on a hot day… I make sure it’s with an elderly person holding a baby.

(1972 – ) stand-up comedian & actor
Animals Dogs Situations

Dachshunds are ideal dogs for small children, as they are already stretched and pulled to such a length that a child cannot do much harm one way or another.

(1889 – 1945) actor, author & humorist
Animals Children Dogs People

The lion and the calf shall lie down together but the calf won’t get much sleep.

(1935 – ) movie actor, director & comedian
Animals Conflict Situations Sleep

A few alligators are naturally of the vicious type and inclined to resent it when you prod them with a stick. You can find out which ones these are by prodding; if we do the same thing for the same reason, we call it intelligence.

(1884 – 1949) American humorist & literary critic
Animals

My horse was so late getting home, he tiptoed into the stable.

(1906 – 1998) English-born American comedian
Activities Animals

Impeccable Birdfeeding: How to Discourage Scuffling, Hull-dropping, Seed-throwing, Unmentionable Nuisances and Vulgar Chatter at Your Birdfeeder

Animals Book Titles

I’m fond of pigs… dogs look up to us… cats look down on us… pigs treat us as equal.

(1874 – 1965) British prime minister, politician, statesman & orator
Animals Cats Dogs

Man is the only animal that plays poker.

(1889 – 1966) American humorist, writer, illustrator & cartoonist
Activities Animals People

Racehorse: A barn athlete.

Animals Definitions Wordplay

Fish: An animal that grows fastest between the time it is caught and the time a fisherman describes it to his friends.

Activities Animals Definitions

Life is like a dogsled team; if you ain’t the lead dog, the scenery never changes.

(1946 – 1994) writer & humorist
Animals Dogs Life

The cat could very well be man’s best friend but would never stoop to admitting it.

(1926 – ) newspaper columnist
Animals Cats

A bird in the hand is dead.

Animals Death Murphy’s Laws

If you can’t sleep, count sheep. Don’t count endangered animals. You will run out.

(1968 – 2005) American stand-up comedian
Activities Animals Sleep

He has all the characteristics of a dog except loyalty.

(1793 – 1863) American politician, statesman & soldier
Animals Characteristics Dogs Insults

As anyone who has ever been around a cat for any length of time well knows, cats have enormous patience with the limitations of the human kind.

(1917 – 1998) author, critic, animal rights activist
Animals Cats

The more one gets to know of men, the more one values dogs.

(1803 – 1885) French writer & journalist
Animals Dogs People

The whale is endangered, while the ant continues to do just fine.

(1915 – 1977) columnist, writer & actor
Animals

Democracy is two wolves and a lamb voting on what to have for lunch.

(1706 – 1790) American statesman, author, scientist & inventor
Animals Democracy Elections/Voting Government

Cat: A soft, indestructible automaton provided by nature to be kicked when things go wrong in the domestic circle.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Animals Cats Communication Definitions Language