Subject: Appearance » Body (Page 13)

He's had so many face-lifts, his face has moved to the top of his head, you have to get on a step-ladder to watch him lie!

(1971 – ) Irish comedian, actor & writer
Appearance Body Insults

I have such poor vision I can date anybody.

(1949 – 2016) American comedian & television actor
Appearance Body Characteristics People

High heels were invented by a woman who had been kissed on the forehead.

(1890 – 1957) author & journalist
Appearance Body Clothing Women

Fat: Energy gone to waist.

Appearance Body Definitions Fat

If you have a pear shaped body, you should not wear pear colored clothes, or act juicy.

(1973 – ) American comedian
Appearance Body

She was so tall if she fell down she would be halfway home.

Appearance Body Expressions

She looks better goin than comin!

Appearance Body Expressions Ugly

Anyone might become homosexual after seeing Glenda Jackson naked.

(1939 – 2001) British author & journalist
Appearance Body Insults

Is my wife dissatisfied with my body?… a small part of me says yes.

Canadian stand-up comedian, actor & writer
Appearance Body

My arms register as legs. And my legs register as firewood.

(1981 – ) American Comedian
Appearance Body

You are 32, you are rapidly approaching the age when your body, whether it embarrasses you or not, begins to embarrass other people.

English author, actor, humorist & playwright
Age Appearance Body

It's hard to feel fit as a fiddle when you're shaped like a cello.

American basketball coach & executive
Appearance Body People Self

She’s so hairy – when she lifted up her arm I thought it was Tina Turner in her armpit.

(1935 – 2014) American comedian, television personality, writer & director
Appearance Body Hair Insults

Where lipstick is concerned, the important thing is not color, but to accept God's final word on where your lips end.

(1954 – ) comedian & television actor
Appearance Body

I really don’t think I need buns of steel; I’d be happy with buns of cinnamon.

(1958 – ) comedian, actress & television host
Appearance Body

I'd give my right arm to be ambidextrous.

Appearance Body Characteristics

He is so fat… his blood type is Ragu.

Appearance Body Exaggerations Fat

I'm in terrible shape… I need a nap after I fart.

(1965 – ) American stand-up comedian & television host
Appearance Body

Anatomy: A class that sounds vaguely risqué until you find out what it really involves.

Body Definitions Education School

Not one man in a beer commercial has a beer belly.

(1953 – ) comedian, dancer & writer
Alcohol Appearance Beer Body Men

The other day, I got a henna tattoo that says “Forever.”

(1969 – ) comedian & actor
Appearance Body