Subject: Appearance » Body (Page 7)

It's hard to feel fit as a fiddle when you're shaped like a cello.

American basketball coach & executive
Appearance Body People Self

Yeah, she's beautiful, but you can't find her IQ with a flashlight.

Appearance Body Insults Intelligence

There's one thing about baldness; it's neat.

(1889 – 1966) American humorist, writer, illustrator & cartoonist
Appearance Body

The uglier a man’s legs are, the better he plays golf.

Appearance Body Golf Murphy’s Laws Sports

A severed foot is the ultimate stocking stuffer.

(1968 – 2005) American stand-up comedian
Appearance Body

She is so fat… when she was a kid she could only play seek.

Appearance Body Exaggerations Fat

She is so fat… when you tell her to haul ass, she gotta make two trips.

Appearance Body Exaggerations Fat

Getting old is when a narrow waist and a broad mind change places!

fictional mascot and cover boy of Mad, an American humor magazine
Age Appearance Body Old

When I was pregnant, my friends sneered: ‘Eating for two, are we?’… I said, get lost, I’m not cutting down.

(1957 – ) British stand-up comedian
Appearance Body Eating Food/Drink

I don't wear a watch because I want my arms to weigh the same.

(1968 – 2005) American stand-up comedian
Appearance Body Things

The body of a young woman is God's greatest achievement; of course He could have made it to last longer, but you can't have everything.

(1927 – 2018) playwright & screenwriter
Appearance Body People Women

The colder the x-ray table, the more of your body is required on it.

Body Cold Murphy’s Laws Science/Weather Situations

Do you know how short you have to be to have a Napoleon complex in North Korea?

(1965 – 2010) American stand-up comedian & television personality
Appearance Body Places

I’ve seen some players with very big feet, and some with very small feet.

English football player, manager & sports commentator
Appearance Body

We all get heavier as we get older because there’s a lot more information in our heads.

professional basketball player
Age Body Intelligence Misspokements Sports

Scientists now believe that the primary biological function of breasts is to make males stupid.

(1947 – ) American columnist & humorist
Appearance Body Intelligence Men People Stupidity

I’m the female equivalent of a counterfeit $20 bill; half of what you see is a pretty good reproduction, the rest is a fraud.

(1946 – ) American recording artist, actress, director & record producer
Appearance Body People Self

You'd be surprised how much it costs to look this cheap!

(1946 – ) singer, songwriter, author & actress
Appearance Body Clothing Money

Short girls who take all the tall guys.

American professional tennis player
Appearance Body Sports

This morning when I put on my underwear I could hear the Fruit-of-The-Loom guys laughing at me.

(1921 – 2004) stand-up comedian & actor
Appearance Body Clothing

Optimist: A middle-aged man who believes that the cleaners have been shrinking the waistband of his pants.

Body Characteristics Definitions People