Subject: Appearance » Clothing (Page 5)

All other things being equal, the side with the simplest uniforms wins.

Appearance Clothing Military Murphy’s Laws

When you’re gay every party is a bad sweater party.

(1970 –) American stand-up comedian
Appearance Clothing

I went into a clothing store, and the lady asked me what size I was, I said, 'Actual' … I'm not to scale.

(1973 – ) American comedian
Appearance Clothing Situations

If the shoe fits, get another one just like it.

Appearance Clothing

My wife met me at the door the other night in a sexy negligee; unfortunately, she was just coming home.

(1921 – 2004) stand-up comedian & actor
Appearance Clothing Sex Wives

Armor: The kind of clothing worn by a man whose tailor is a blacksmith.

Clothing Definitions

She wears her clothes as if they were thrown on with a pitch folk.

(1667 – 1745) Irish satirist & essayist
Appearance Clothing Insults

But he was the worst dresser in organized baseball; he made Inspector Clouseau look like a candidate for Mr. Blackwell's list of best-dressed men.

American baseball pitcher
Appearance Basketball Clothing Sports

The reason women don’t play football is because eleven of them would never wear the same outfit in public.

(1917 – 2012) comedian & actress
Appearance Clothing Football Sports

The same dress is indecent ten years before its time; daring one year before its time; chic in its time; dowdy five years after its time; hideous twenty years after its time; amusing thirty years after its time; romantic one hundred years after its time; beautiful one hundred and fifty years after its time.

(1899 – 1975) English fashion designer & critic
Appearance Clothing

A four-hundred-dollar suit on him would look like socks on a rooster.

(1895 – 1960) American politician
Appearance Clothing Insults

I don't believe in the after life, although I am bringing a change of underwear.

(1935 – ) movie actor, director & comedian
Beliefs Clothing Things

She was a large woman who seemed not so much dressed as upholstered.

(1860 – 1937) Scottish author, dramatist (creator of Peter Pan)
Appearance Body Clothing Insults

As soon as the hospital made me put on one of those little gowns, I knew the end was in sight.


Appearance Body Clothing

To attract the most attention, a woman should be either nude or wearing something as expensive as getting her nude is going to be.

(1947 – ) author, humorist & satirist
Appearance Clothing

Brevity is the soul of lingerie.

(1893 – 1967) writer, humorist & poet
Appearance Clothing

Eternal nothingness is fine if you happen to be dressed for it.

(1935 – ) movie actor, director & comedian
Appearance Clothing Science/Weather

Sweater: Garment worn by child when its mother is feeling chilly.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Appearance Clothing Definitions

A lady is one who never shows her underwear unintentionally.


Appearance Clothing

Bathing Suit: A garment cut to see level.

Appearance Clothing Definitions Wordplay

Beware of all enterprises that require new clothes.

(1817 – 1862) American author, poet, philosopher,, naturalist & historian
Appearance Clothing