Subject: Appearance (Page 17)

A lady is one who never shows her underwear unintentionally.


Appearance Clothing

But he was the worst dresser in organized baseball; he made Inspector Clouseau look like a candidate for Mr. Blackwell's list of best-dressed men.

American baseball pitcher
Appearance Basketball Clothing Sports

She was so ugly that when I bent down to pet her cat it turned out to be the hair on her legs.

(1921 – 2004) stand-up comedian & actor
Appearance Body Hair Ugly

If you perm your hair twice in opposite directions, does it come out straight?

(1975 – ) English physicist
Appearance Hair Situations

I refuse to think of them as chin hairs; I think of them as stray eyebrows.

Appearance

You know the message you’re sending out to the world with these sweatpants? You’re telling the world, ‘I give up.’

(1954 – ) comedian & television actor
Appearance Clothing TV/Movie Quotes

She was short on intellect, but long on shape.

(1672 – 1719) English essasyist, poet & politician
Appearance Body Intelligence

Some days even my lucky rocketship underpants won’t help.

(1955 – ) cartoonist (Calvin and Hobbes)
Clothing Life Miscellaneous

‘Mature’ means old, ‘athletic’ means flat chested and ‘not model thin’ means circus fat.

(1961 – ) American actress
Appearance TV/Movie Quotes

Phyllis Diller’s had so many facelifts, there’s nothing left in her shoes.

(1903 – 2003) English-born American comedian & actor
Appearance Body

When I don't look like the tragic muse, I look like the smoky relic of the great Boston Fire.

(1832 – 1888) novelist
Appearance People Self

Her hat is a creation that will never go out of style; it will look ridiculous year after year.

(1894 – 1956) American radio comedian
Appearance Clothing Insults

So crosseyed, she could look at her own head.

Appearance Expressions

I ain’t afraid to die fat… that’s my pallbearers’ worry.


Appearance Death Fat

Beauty is only skin deep, but it is a valuable asset if you are poor or have not any sense.

(1868 – 1930) cartoonist, humorist & journalist
Appearance

Comparing Madonna with Marilyn Monroe is like comparing Raquel Welch with the back of a bus.

George Alan O'Dowd (1961 – ) British singer-songwriter
Appearance Body People

Body odor is nature’s alarm clock and a lot of people from my home town are hitting the snooze alarm.

American comedian
Appearance Body People

She's the sort of woman who lives for others… you can tell the others by their hunted expression.

(1898 – 1963) Irish-born British novelist, literary critic & essayist
Appearance Insults

I suppose you know you have a wonderful body; I’d like to do it in clay.

(1925 – ) American singer & actress
Appearance Body

Only your real friends will tell you when your face is dirty.

Appearance Proverbs

Wrinkles are hereditary; parents get them from their children.

(1924 – ) American actress & singer
Appearance Children Family Parents