Subject: Appearance (Page 29)

The best cure for hypochondria is to forget about your body and get interested in someone else's.

(Aiskowitz) (1899 – 1982) humorist
Appearance Body Health

It's hard to lead a cavalry charge if you think you look funny on a horse.

(1900 – 1965) diplomat & Democratic politician
Appearance Situations

Maybe it's the hair, maybe it's the teeth, maybe it's the intellect…. no, it's the hair.

(1944 – ) American television critic
Appearance Insults

The trouble with jogging is that, by the time you realize you’re not in shape for it, it’s too far to walk back.

(1908 – 1980) businessman, humorist
Activities Body

I just lost 10 pounds on a new diet called ‘the flu.’

(1970 – ) American actor, producer & stand up comedian
Appearance Body Health

Time may be a great healer, but’s it’s a lousy beautician.

Appearance Health Time

Actually, it only seems as though you mustn't be deceived by appearances.

Appearance Characteristics Murphy’s Laws

Behind every successful man, you’ll find a woman who has nothing to wear.

(1908 – 1997) American actor
Appearance Clothing Men People Success Women

I model irregular clothing.

(1966 – ) American stand-up comic
Appearance Clothing

She is so ugly… when she gets up, the sun goes down.

Appearance Exaggerations Ugly

Every time I breathe, they like, ‘Why you breathing so hard?'…So I can live!


Appearance Fat Self

Men want the same thing from their underwear that they want from women: a little bit of support, and a little bit of freedom.

(1954 – ) comedian & television actor
Clothing Men People Women

Christians can have big tits, too.

(1921 – 2011) American film actress & sex symbol
Appearance Beliefs Body Religion

Professional model: cheekbones that sell cosmetics; hipbones that sell anorexia.

(1950 – ) American author, satirist, webmaster & copywriter
Appearance Body Definitions

Jewelry takes people's minds off your wrinkles.

(1912 – 1969) Norwegian figure skater & actress
Age Appearance Old Things

I would say the world's in terrible shape, but I'm afraid the world would say, 'Look who's talking!'

(1943 – 1974) American singer (Mamas & Papas)
Appearance Body Fat People Places Self World

You'll never find the answer to 'What's the right hat?'

(1941 – ) American singer
Appearance Clothing

He had one eye, and the popular prejudice runs in favor of two.

(1812 – 1870) English novelist
Appearance Body

I’d wring your neck… if you had one.

(1899 – 1973) English playwright, actor, composer, director & songwriter
Appearance Body Insults

You know you're getting fat when you go to unbutton the top of your pants – and you already did it.

(1965 – ) American stand-up comedian, actor, director & author
Appearance Body Clothing Fat

Wearing a turtleneck is like getting strangled by a really weak guy all day.

(1968 – 2005) American stand-up comedian
Appearance Clothing People