Subject: Appearance (Page 4)

Kiss and make up – but too much makeup has ruined many a kiss.

(1893 – 1980) actress, playwright, screenwriter & sex symbol
Appearance Body

Dorothy, was Sophia naked just now or does her dress really need ironing?

1922) American actress, comedian & television personality
Appearance TV/Movie Quotes

In the 1950's only seven percent of American women dyed their hair; today there are parts of Manhattan and Los Angeles where there are no gray-haired women at all.

(1941 – 2012) American novelist, producer, screenwriter & director
Appearance Hair People Women

He was so ugly… he hurt my feelings.

(1894 – 1975) American comedian
Appearance Body Ugly

Elizabeth Taylor has more chins than the Chinese telephone directory.

(1935 – 2014) American comedian, television personality, writer & director
Appearance Fat Insults

The scrotum – a design fault, excess elbow skin put in between mens legs to keep their balls so they don't have to hold them in their hand… although it didn't work!

(1942 – ) Scottish comedian, musician & actor
Appearance Body

How is it possible to find meaning in a finite world, given my waist and shirt size?

(1935 – ) movie actor, director & comedian
Beliefs Characteristics Clothing

Did you know babies are nauseated by the smell of a clean shirt?

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
Children Clothing Family Health

The reason most people play golf is to wear clothes they would not be caught dead in otherwise.

novelist, screenwriter & businessman
Clothing Golf Sports

When packing for a vacation, take half as much clothing and twice as much money.

Clothing Money Murphy’s Laws

Elizabeth Taylor was so fat that whenever she went to London in a red dress, 30 passengers would try to board her.

(1935 – 2014) American comedian, television personality, writer & director
Appearance Fat Insults

I was never over-weight, just under-tall; the correct height for my weight at the moment is seven feet ten and a half inches.

(1951 – ) Irish comedian & singer
Appearance Body Fat

Nature played a cruel trick on her by giving her a waxed mustache.

English author, actor, humorist & playwright
Appearance Insults

If you have a funny costume, you can’t really wear it when you get older.

(1959 – ) American actor, stand-up comedian & television host
Age Appearance Clothing

You want to look younger… rent smaller children.

(1917 – 2012) comedian & actress
Age Appearance Children Young

Girdle: The difference between fact and figure.

Appearance Body Clothing Definitions

Diana Rigg is built like a brick mausoleum with insufficient flying buttresses.

(1925 – ) American author and literary, theater & film critic
Appearance Body

Eating will now be an entirely new ball game. I might have to buy a new pair of trousers.

English jockey
Appearance Eating Sports

I wanna tell you… I was ugly. I was so ugly, I went to the proctologist and he stuck his fingers in my mouth.

(1921 – 2004) stand-up comedian & actor
Appearance Self

He is so fat… when he gets his shoes shined he has to take the man's word for it.

Appearance Body Exaggerations Fat

Women wear a pair of panties but only one bra.

(1946 – ) American comedian
Appearance Clothing Miscellaneous