Subject: Appearance (Page 41)

A little incompatibility is the spice of life, as long as he has income and she is pattable.

(1902 – 1971) American humorist & poet
Appearance Body Money Situations Women

Elizabeth Taylor looks like two small boys fighting underneath a thick blanket.

Richard Blackwell (1922 – 2008) fashion critic, journalist, & designer
Appearance Insults

I know the name, but I can’t replace the face.

professional baseball player
Appearance Misspokements

But he was the worst dresser in organized baseball; he made Inspector Clouseau look like a candidate for Mr. Blackwell's list of best-dressed men.

American baseball pitcher
Appearance Basketball Clothing Sports

I'd hire her to haunt a house!

Appearance Miscellaneous Ugly

She was short on intellect, but long on shape.

(1866 – 1944) American writer, newspaper columnist, playwright & humorist
Appearance Insults Intelligence

Have you ever taken something out of the clothes hamper because it had become, relatively, the cleanest thing?

(1928 – ) British journalist, writer & columnist
Appearance Clothing Housework

Bathing Suit: A garment cut to see level.

Appearance Clothing Definitions Wordplay

She’s like an apple turnover that got crushed in a grocery bag on a hot day.

(1947 – ) American author, teacher & social critic
Appearance Insults People

Shin: A device for finding furniture in the dark.

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Appearance Body Definitions

I would say the world's in terrible shape, but I'm afraid the world would say, 'Look who's talking!'

(1943 – 1974) American singer (Mamas & Papas)
Appearance Body Fat People Places Self World

I belong to a gym now… well, let me rephrase that: I don't belong there at all, but I go.

(1969 – ) American stand-up comedian
Appearance Body

He's a trellis for varicose veins.

(1876 – 1933) screenwriter
Appearance Body Insults

[while filling out a form] Jim: Eyes…

Elaine Nardo: No, don’t put two.

Jim: Oh, they mean color, don’t they?

(1938 – ) American actor
Appearance TV/Movie Quotes

I can’t wear yellow anymore; it’s too matchy-matchy with my catheter.

(1935 – 2014) American comedian, television personality, writer & director
Appearance Self

Reform: To gain or lose weight.

Appearance Body Definitions

The scrotum – a design fault, excess elbow skin put in between mens legs to keep their balls so they don't have to hold them in their hand… although it didn't work!

(1942 – ) Scottish comedian, musician & actor
Appearance Body

[Suzanne modeling a fur pull-over] Protestor: 50 animals died because of that coat!

Suzanne: Wanna make it 51?

(1956 – ) American actress, comedian, producer & author
Clothing TV/Movie Quotes

Accident: A condition in which presence of mind is good, but absence of body is better.

Accidents Body Mind Problems

The first thing men notice about a woman is her eyes; then, when her eyes aren't looking, they notice her breasts.

(1963 – ) television host & comedian
Appearance Body Men People Women

Claire: Your hair looks good, the curls work. Why don’t you get a perm?
Rose Morgan: I tried that once, I looked like Shirley Temple on crack.

(1942 – ) American singer-songwriter, actress, writer, film producer & director
Appearance Hair TV/Movie Quotes