Subject: Appearance (Page 6)

Never darken my Dior again!

(1894 – 1989) Canadian actress
Appearance Clothing Situations

If you retain nothing else, always remember the most important rule of beauty, which is: who cares?

(1970 – ) American actress, comedian, writer & producer
Appearance

A waist is a terrible thing to mind.

Appearance Body Fat

She’s so fat she wears stretch kaftans.

(1935 – 2014) American comedian, television personality, writer & director
Appearance Body Clothing Fat

The quartermaster has only two sizes, too large and too small.

Clothing Government Military Murphy’s Laws

How do I know what you said? Damn you and your noise-cancelling breasts.

(1980 – ) American actor, comedian & musician
Appearance TV/Movie Quotes

He is so fat… when he joined Overeaters Anonymous and they make him a chapter.

Appearance Body Exaggerations Fat

Some people say George Foreman is fit as a fiddle, but I think he looks more like a cello.

(1922 – ) boxing trainer & manager
Appearance Body Boxing Sports

The weirder you’re going to behave, the more normal you should look.

(1947 – ) author, humorist & satirist
Appearance Clothing

Not a gentleman… dresses too well.

(1872 – 1970) British philosopher, mathematician, historian & social critic
Appearance Clothing Insults

A lie gets halfway around the world before the truth has a chance to get its pants on.

(1874 – 1965) British prime minister, politician, statesman & orator
Characteristics Clothing Communication Lies Truth World

This is day 14 of my head held hostage by this god awful haircut.

(1966 – ) American stand-up comedian & actor
Appearance

Fat is lost last where it is wanted the least. Corollary 1: Fat is lost first from areas of high desirability.
Corollary 2: With time fat flows from areas of high to low desirability. – Hal Belknap, M.D.

Appearance Body Fat Murphy’s Laws

My hope is that gays will be running the world, because then there would be no war… just a greater emphasis on military apparel.

(1952 – ) comedian, actress & writer
Clothing Conflict Government Military War

I wanna tell you… I was ugly. I was so ugly, I went to the proctologist and he stuck his fingers in my mouth.

(1921 – 2004) stand-up comedian & actor
Appearance Self

Strip Teaser: One who makes a bare living.

Body Definitions Occupations

You’re prettier than a spotted heifer in a pansy patch!

Appearance Expressions

I'm at an age when my back goes out more than I do.

(1917 – 2012) comedian & actress
Age Body Old

I'm in terrible shape… I need a nap after I fart.

(1965 – ) American stand-up comedian & television host
Appearance Body

Men who can eat anything they want and not gain weight should do it out of sight of women.

(1953 – ) comedian, dancer & writer
Appearance Body Fat Men People Women

I had a girlfriend that was so fat she wore a "Cross Your Thighs" bra.

(1921 – 2004) stand-up comedian & actor
Appearance Clothing Fat Girlfriends People