Subject: Beliefs (Page 14)

A liberal is man who will give away everything he doesn’t own.

(1902 – 1963) Danish actor
Beliefs

I'm looking for loopholes.

(1880 – 1946) comedian, actor, juggler & writer
Beliefs Reading/Writing Religion

Whenever you find yourself on the side of the majority, it is time to pause and reflect.

Samuel Clemens (1835 – 1910) author & humorist
Beliefs Opinion

The louder he talked of his honor, the faster we counted our spoons.

(1803 – 1882) essayist, poet, & philosopher
Characteristics Honesty

Whenever people agree with me I always feel I must be wrong.

(1854 – 1900) Irish dramatist, novelist & poet
Characteristics Opinion People

God don't make no mistakes… that's how He got to be God.

television character, All In the Family (Carroll O’Connor)
Beliefs God Mistakes

Never believe anything until it has been officially denied.

(1904 – 1981) British journalist
Beliefs

Don't lie, steal, or cheat unnecessarily.

Characteristics Conflict Honesty Murphy’s Laws

I think it pisses God off if you walk by the color purple in a field somewhere and don’t notice it.

(1944 – ) American author & activist
Beliefs

Prayer must never be answered: if it is, it ceases to be prayer and becomes correspondence.

(1854 – 1900) Irish dramatist, novelist & poet
Beliefs Communication

Man will occasionally stumble over the truth, but most of the time he will pick himself up and continue on.

Characteristics Murphy’s Laws Truth

A man who will not lie to a woman has very little consideration for her feelings.

(1918 - 2002) American author
Beliefs Lies People Women

Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than going to the garage makes you a car.

(1874 – 1936) English author & mystery novelist
Autos Beliefs Religion Things

My mom brought us to mass every Sunday – short for ‘massive head trauma’ that you get from your mother punching you in your little nine-year-old head every minute because you can’t sit still for anything that’s boring.

(1957 – 2007) American stand-up comedian & actor
Beliefs Family Mothers Religion

A critic is someone who never actually goes to the battle, yet who afterwards comes out shooting the wounded.

(1946 – ) American stage & screen actress
Beliefs Communication Occupations Work

I was working on a flat tax proposal and accidentally proved there was no God.

cartoon character in The Simpsons (Dan Castellaneta)
Beliefs God TV/Movie Quotes

I’m still not sure if I understand ambiguity.

Beliefs Opinion

Advertising is the art of making whole lies out of half truths.


Characteristics Communication Honesty Lies Truth

Finally, a guy who says what people who aren’t thinking are thinking.

(1962 – ) American political satirist, writer, television host & comedian
Beliefs Intelligence Opinion Thinking

If beauty is truth, why don’t women go to the library to have their hair done?

(1805 – 1864) English editor, novelist & sporting writer
Appearance People Truth Women

You do a lot of praying, but most of the time the answer is “no.”

(1923 – 2001) American football coach
Football Religion Sports