Subject: Beliefs (Page 31)

Never believe anything until it has been officially denied.

(1904 – 1981) British journalist
Beliefs

If you’re caught on a golf course during a storm and are afraid of lightning, hold up a 1-iron; not even God can hit a 1-iron.

(1942 – ) American professional golfer
God Golf Sports

I have a friend; he keeps trying to convince me he’s a compulsive liar, but I don’t believe him.

(1970 – ) American comedian & television game show host
Beliefs Honesty Lies

The critic has to educate the public; the artist has to educate the critic.

(1854 – 1900) Irish dramatist, novelist & poet
Communication Entertainment Opinion

Anything asserted without evidence can be dismissed without evidence.

Beliefs Facts Murphy’s Laws

In modern business it is not the crook who is to be feared most, it is the honest man who doesn't know what he is doing.

(1874 – 1962) American industrialist, lawyer & diplomat
Honesty Work

Every scientific truth goes through three states: first, people say it conflicts with the Bible; next, they say it has been discovered before; lastly, they say they always believed it.

(1807 – 1873) paleontologist, glaciologist & geologist
Beliefs Facts Science/Weather

The difference between a saint and a hypocrite is that one lies for his religion, the other by it.

(1861 – 1950) American writer
Beliefs Religion

I have found the best way to give advice to your children is to find out what they want and then advise them to do it.

(1884 – 1972) 33rd U.S. president
Beliefs Children

It was not the apple on the tree but the pair on the ground that caused the trouble in the garden.

Beliefs People Religion Sex

These days, the only time politicians tell the truth is when they call each other a liar.

fictional mascot and cover boy of Mad, an American humor magazine
Characteristics Honesty Lies Politicians Truth

Don't piss on my leg and tell me it's rainin'!

Characteristics Expressions Honesty

We must respect the other fellow's religion, but only in the sense and to the extent that we respect his theory that his wife is beautiful and his children smart.

(1880 – 1956) journalist, essayist, editor & satirist
Appearance Characteristics Children Intelligence Religion Wives

I don’t believe in sceptics.

British writer, actor, comic & television & radio presenter
Beliefs People

If there is a God, his plan is very similar to someone not having a plan.

(1962 – ) English stand-up comedian & actor
Beliefs God

Life in Lubbock, Texas taught me two things: One is that God loves you and you're going to burn in hell; the other is that sex is the most awful, filthy thing on earth, and you should save it for someone you love.

(1945 – ) American country/folk musician & song writer
Beliefs Life Places Religion Sex

Why should I talk to you?… I've just been talking to your boss.

(1876 – 1933) screenwriter
Beliefs Communication Death God

If I’m on the course and lightning starts, I get inside fast… if God wants to play through, let him.

(1903 – 2003) English-born American comedian & actor
God Golf Sports

Anyone who tells a lie has not a pure heart. and cannot make a good soup.

(1770 – 1827) German composer & pianist
Beliefs Honesty Lies

There are some people so addicted to exaggeration that they can’t tell the truth without lying.

(1818 – 1885) humorist
Characteristics Honesty Lies

I have a lot of respect for anyone who can tour without an album.

(1953 – ) comedian, dancer & writer
Religion Situations