Subject: Beliefs (Page 9)

A drama critic is a person who surprises the playwright by informing him what he meant.

(1876 – 1933) screenwriter
Communication Insults Opinion

The trouble with facts is that there are so many of them.

(1857 – 1927) Unitarian Universalist minister
Facts Science/Weather

If you are not an idealist by the time you are twenty you don’t have a heart, but if you are still an idealist by thirty you don’t have a head.

(1886 – 1918) American progressive writer & intellectual
Beliefs

If the facts do not conform to the theory, they must be disposed of.

Facts Murphy’s Laws Science/Weather

Those who believe in telekinetics, raise my hand.

(1922 – 2007) American novelist
Beliefs

The sheer immensity of the human self as envisioned by the world's religions is awesome.

(1919 – ) American religious studies scholar
Beliefs People Religion Self

It was not the apple on the tree but the pair on the ground that caused the trouble in the garden.

Beliefs People Religion Sex

Man makes plans . . . and God laughs.

(1963 – ) American writer
Beliefs God

An argument is a question with two sides and no end.

Beliefs Communication

Politicians are wedded to the truth, but like many other married couples they sometimes live apart.

(1870 – 1916) British writer
Government Politicians Truth

Raise him a Luferan if you want, raise him a Norman with 7 wives, a holy roller, a Seventh Day Adventurer…

television character, All In the Family (Carroll O’Connor)
Malaprops Religion

Our loss is their loss.

(1906 – 1972) pianist, composer, author, comedian & actor
Beliefs Insults Religion

It was once said truly that the greatest American superstition was belief in facts.

(1901 – 1970) American journalist & author
America Beliefs Facts

My parents are Catholic, which means that they love Jesus and liquor and I don't think there's anything more Mexican than that.

(1974 – ) American stand-up comedian
People Religion

Facts are stubborn things.

(1911 – 2004) 40th U.S. president & actor
Beliefs Facts

The theory seems to be that as long as a man is a failure he is one of God's children, but that as soon as he succeeds he is taken over by the Devil.

(1880 – 1956) journalist, essayist, editor & satirist
Beliefs Failure God Success

I'm part of the Jehovah's Witness Protection Program; I have to go door-to-door and tell everybody I'm somebody else.

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Beliefs

If there is a God, his plan is very similar to someone not having a plan.

(1962 – ) English stand-up comedian & actor
Beliefs God

There are no atheists in foxholes.

(1828-1882) English poet, illustrator, painter & translator
Beliefs God

Euphemism is a euphemism for lying.

(Roberta Lee Streeter) (1944 – ) American singer-songwriter
Characteristics Honesty Lies

If you want to know what God thinks of money, you only have to look at those to whom he gives it.

(1874 – 1945) English writer, translator & war correspondent
Beliefs God Money