Subject: Beliefs (Page 9)

My Opinions Change With New Information

Beliefs Opinion Signs

A liberal is one who has both feet planted firmly in the air.

(1900 – 1965) diplomat & Democratic politician
Beliefs Government

Once again, we come to the holiday season, a deeply religious time that each of us observes, in his own way, by going to the mall of his choice.

(1947 – ) American columnist & humorist
Activities Beliefs Religion Shopping

Reality is nothing but a collective hunch.

(1935 – ) screenwriter, author, director & producer
Beliefs Intelligence

Since a politician never believes what he says, he is quite surprised to be taken at his word.

(1890 – 1970) French president, general & statesman
Characteristics Government Honesty Politicians Truth

Isn't it fun to go out on the course and lie in the sun?

(1903 – 2003) English-born American comedian & actor
Beliefs Golf Honesty Lies Sports

I dislike censorship; like an appendix it is useless when inert and dangerous when active.

(1911 – 1975) British politician
Beliefs Communication

If God wanted me to bend over, he’d have put diamonds on the floor.

(1935 – 2014) American comedian, television personality, writer & director
Activities God

A Sunday school is a prison in which children do penance for the evil conscience of their parents.

(1880 – 1956) journalist, essayist, editor & satirist
Beliefs Children Family Parents Religion

Washington couldn't tell a lie, Nixon couldn't tell the truth, and Reagan couldn't tell the difference.

(1927 – ) Canadian-born American comedian & actor
Characteristics Honesty Insults Lies

I have found the best way to give advice to your children is to find out what they want and then advise them to do it.

(1884 – 1972) 33rd U.S. president
Beliefs Children

Who are you going to believe, me or your own eyes?

(1890 – 1977) comedian, actor & television host
Appearance Beliefs Characteristics

Men don't get cellulite — God might just be a man.

(1953 – ) comedian, dancer & writer
Beliefs God Men

He is a shifty-eyed goddamn liar…. he's one of the few in the history of this country to run for high office talking out of both sides of his mouth at the same time and lying out of both sides.

(1884 – 1972) 33rd U.S. president
Characteristics Honesty Insults Lies

You do not need to put an Obama sticker on a Prius… we get it.


Autos Beliefs Things

In order to preserve your self-respect, it is sometimes necessary to lie and cheat.

(1930 – ) American author and billiard player, teacher & commentator
Characteristics Honesty Lies

The Jews celebrate Passover by eating unpalatable food to remind them what will happen to their people if they ever leave New York City.

(1962 – ) American political satirist, writer, television host & comedian
Beliefs New York City Places Religion

The success of any venture will be helped by prayer, even in the wrong denomination.

Beliefs Murphy’s Laws Success

If Attila the Hun were alive today, he’d be a drama critic.

(1928 – ) playwright
Beliefs Opinion

Most of us spend the first six days of each week sowing wild oats, then we go to church on Sunday and pray for a crop failure.

(1894 – 1956) American radio comedian
Beliefs Sex

Exaggeration is a billion times worse than understatement.

Beliefs Communication