Subject: Characteristics (Page 11)

More than 150 heads of state attended the UN Summit, giving New Yorkers a chance to get in touch with prejudices they didn't even know they had.

(1962 – ) American political satirist, writer, television host & comedian
Characteristics People

He’d steal flies from a blind spider.

Characteristics Expressions Honesty

Who are you going to believe, me or your own eyes?

(1890 – 1977) comedian, actor & television host
Appearance Beliefs Characteristics

There are no good girls gone wrong, just bad girls found out.

(1893 – 1980) actress, playwright, screenwriter & sex symbol
Characteristics Girls People Women

My dentist found a new way to cover up his bad breath… he holds up his arms

(1921 – 2004) stand-up comedian & actor
Characteristics Health

Reputation is character minus what you’ve been caught doing.

American comedian, writer, consultant & author
Characteristics

Our ego is our silent partner – too often with a controlling interest.

(1923 – ) American quote & quip writer
Characteristics People Self

Expecting the world to treat you fairly because you are good is like expecting the bull not to charge because you are a vegetarian.

(1939 – ) American television host, producer & author
Characteristics Life

My girlfriend bought me a down jacket, she said it fit my personality.

(1966 – ) American stand-up comic
Appearance Characteristics Clothing

Home is where you hang your head.

(1890 – 1977) comedian, actor & television host
Characteristics

Ambition is a poor excuse for not having enough sense to be lazy.

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Characteristics

She has the answer to everything and the solution to nothing.

(1906 – 1972) pianist, composer, author, comedian & actor
Characteristics Insults

The other night I went out on a date with a guy who said he didn't like girls who were fragile or vulnerable… so I stabbed him.

comedian
Characteristics Dating Relationships Situations

I want to make a revolving door that says “Pull” on it, just see how obedient people are.

(1973 – ) American comedian
Characteristics

I don't have any tattoos or piercings yet, but I do have a cold sore I've been ignoring.

(1959 – ) American comedian, actress & singer
Characteristics People Self

Be kind to your mother-in-law, but pay for her board at some good hotel.

(1818 – 1885) humorist
Characteristics Family

You can pick out the actors by the glazed look that comes into their eyes when the conversation wanders away from themselves.

(1912 – 1979) English actor
Acting Characteristics Entertainment

Kindness goes a long ways lots o' times when it ought t' stay at home.

(1868 – 1930) cartoonist, humorist & journalist
Characteristics

A man who knows the price of everything and the value of nothing.

(1854 – 1900) Irish dramatist, novelist & poet
Characteristics

There is no substitute for good manners… except, perhaps, fast reflexes.

Characteristics Murphy’s Laws

When the sun comes up, I have morals again.

(1952 – ) comedian
Characteristics Situations