Subject: Characteristics (Page 19)

He is a shifty-eyed goddamn liar…. he's one of the few in the history of this country to run for high office talking out of both sides of his mouth at the same time and lying out of both sides.

(1884 – 1972) 33rd U.S. president
Characteristics Honesty Insults Lies

I despise the pleasure of pleasing people that I despise.

(1689 – 1762) English aristocrat & writer
Characteristics

You may already be a loser!

(1921 – 2004) stand-up comedian & actor
Characteristics People Self

All your friends are gonna be green with envious.

television character, All In the Family (Carroll O’Connor)
Characteristics Misspokements

He never seemed to be doing anything, and yet he did not like to be disturbed at it.

(1807 – 1892) American poet & advocate of the abolition of slavery
Characteristics Situations Work

Some people have a chip on their shoulder; Billy has a whole lumberyard.

(1919 – 1998) American sportswriter
Baseball Characteristics Sports

Liars get caught by the tale.

Characteristics Honesty Lies Murphy’s Laws

As an intellectual, he bestowed upon the games of golf and bridge all the enthusiasm and perseverance that he withheld from his books and ideas.

(1920 – 1982) foreign bureau chief, editor & speechwriter
Characteristics Golf Insults Intelligence

Slander: To lie, or tell the truth about someone.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Characteristics Communication Definitions

I prefer rogues to imbeciles because they sometimes take a rest.

(1824 – 1895) French writer
Characteristics Fools Intelligence

I’d rather have an inch of a dog than miles of pedigree.

Animals Characteristics People

The English think incompetence is the same thing as sincerity.

(1908 – 1999) English writer
Characteristics England People Places

This guy says, ‘I’m perfect for you, ‘cause I’m a cross between a macho and a sensitive man.’ … I said, ‘Oh, a gay trucker?’

(1956 – ) American entertainer & comedian
Characteristics Men People

You won’t regret the men you never killed, but you will regret the women you passed up.

(1944 – ) English author
Characteristics People Women

… like to think that [Graham] Chapman was there with them all that day— “or rather, he will be in about 25 minutes.”

(1943 – ) English comedian, writer, television host & actor
Characteristics

Accountability: The mother of caution.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Characteristics Definitions

My dad is actually a manic depressive, which is very exciting half the time.

(1963 – ) American stand-up comedian
Characteristics Family Fathers Health

Some people think of the glass as half full; some people think of the glass as half empty; I think of the glass as too big.

(1937 – 2008) stand-up comedian, social critic, actor & author
Characteristics

We had a lot in common; I loved him and he loved him.

(1920 – 2006) American actress
Characteristics Emotions Love

My luck is so bad that if I bought a cemetery, people would stop dying.

(1921 – 2004) stand-up comedian & actor
Characteristics Death People Self

I'm good enough, I'm smart enough, and doggone it, people like me.

(1951 – ) U.S. senator (Minnesota), political commentator, comedian & writer
Characteristics People Self