Subject: Characteristics (Page 36)

I've been accused of vulgarity, and I say that's bullshit!

(1926 – ) film director, screenwriter, composer, comedian, actor & producer
Characteristics Communication Language

He’d fight an anvil.

Characteristics Expressions

It takes a real talent to be able to apologize in a manner that makes the offended person feel guilty.

Characteristics Communication

He is a self-made man and worships his creator.

(1811 – 1889) British statesman
Characteristics Insults

A cynic is a man who, when he smells flowers, looks around for a coffin.

(1880 – 1956) journalist, essayist, editor & satirist
Characteristics People

A gentleman never swears at his wife when ladies are present.

Characteristics Men People

My wife, who tends to be overcautious, had the ultrasound last week, which, even the doctors say, is not necessary when you're adopting.

(1946 – ) American comedian, actor & voice actor
Characteristics

Sooner or later, I'll be punctual.

(1933 – ) English author & cartoonist
Characteristics Time

Indecision may or may not be my problem.

(1946 – ) singer, songwriter, author & businessman
Characteristics Intelligence Problems

Smoking cures weight problems… eventually.

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Activities Body Characteristics Death Fat

The man who can smile when things go wrong has thought of someone he can blame it on.

Characteristics Murphy’s Laws

He lies so bad he hires somebody to call his dogs.

Characteristics Expressions Honesty Lies

She has the answer to everything and the solution to nothing.

(1906 – 1972) pianist, composer, author, comedian & actor
Characteristics Insults

I ain’t got no respect for no religion where the head guy claims he can’t make no mistakes. Like he’s, waddya call, inflammable.

television character, All In the Family (Carroll O’Connor)
Characteristics Malaprops Mistakes

Badness comes in waves.

Characteristics Murphy’s Laws

He’s so mean, he’d bite himself.

Characteristics Expressions

At least you are not obnoxious like so many other people – you are obnoxious in a different and worse way!

Characteristics People

I’m not offended by all the dumb blonde jokes because I know I’m not dumb… and I also know that I’m not blonde.

(1946 – ) singer, songwriter, author & actress
Appearance Characteristics Intelligence

Just cause you got the monkey off your back doesn't mean the circus has left town.

(1937 – 2008) stand-up comedian, social critic, actor & author
Characteristics Health Situations

Misery no longer loves company; nowadays it insists on it.

(1925 – ) columnist & journalist
Characteristics Emotions

Forgive your enemies… if you can’t get back at them any other way.

(1908 – 1980) businessman, humorist
Characteristics