Quotes and One Liners
humorous one-liners, quotations, jokes, Murphy's Laws & more
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Subject:
Characteristics
(Page 4)
Indecision may or may not be my problem.
Jimmy Buffett
(1946 – ) singer, songwriter, author & businessman
Characteristics
Intelligence
Problems
Indecision
There are three secrets to managing. The first secret is have patience. The second is be patient. And the third most important secret is patience.
John McGraw
baseball manager
Baseball
Characteristics
Sports
Patience
To err is human to forgive, infrequent.
Franklin Adams
(1881 – 1960) American columnist
Characteristics
Failure
Mistakes
Problems
Err
Forgiveness
First of all you've got to have talent, and then you've got to marry her like I did.
George Burns
(1896 – 1996) comedian, actor & entertainer
Characteristics
Success
Talent
Wife Gracie Allen
Gravity is a habit that is hard to shake off.
Terry Pratchett
(1948 – ) English novelist
Characteristics
Gravity
Habits
Official dignity tends to increase in inverse ratio to the importance of the country in which the office is held.
Aldous Huxley
(1894 – 1963) English writer
Characteristics
Dignity
There must be a happy medium somewhere between being totally informed and blissfully unaware.
Doug Larson
(1926 – ) newspaper columnist
Characteristics
Intelligence
Awareness
My therapist says I have a preoccupation with vengeance; we'll see about that.
Stewart Francis
Canadian stand-up comedian, actor & writer
Characteristics
Doctors
Health
Vengeance
He's a Republican housewife from Kansas with all the prejudices.
Gore Vidal
(1925 – 2012) author, playwright, essayist & screenwriter
Characteristics
Insults
About Truman Capote
A biography is a book that is usually written about a dead person because it is so unlike him when he was alive.
Evan Esar
(1899 – 1995) humorist
Books
Characteristics
Communication
Reading/Writing
Biography
Tact is making your company feel at home, even though you wish they were.
George E. Bergman
Characteristics
Guests
Tact
Admiration: Our feeling of delight that another person resembles us.
Evan Esar
(1899 – 1995) humorist
Characteristics
People
Admiration
When we are happy we are always good, but when we are good we are not always happy.
Oscar Wilde
(1854 – 1900) Irish dramatist, novelist & poet
Characteristics
Emotions
Happiness
Good
Conscience is a mother-in-law whose visit never ends.
H.L. Mencken
(1880 – 1956) journalist, essayist, editor & satirist
Characteristics
Family
Situations
Conscience
Mother-in-law
I'm a study of a man in chaos in search of frenzy.
Oscar Levant
(1906 – 1972) pianist, composer, author, comedian & actor
Characteristics
Situations
Chaos
Frenzy
Anyone who is capable of getting themselves into a position of power should on no account be allowed to do the job.
Douglas Adams
(1952 – 2001) English writer, dramatist, & musician
Characteristics
Government
People
Work
Influence
He is a modest little man who has a good deal to be modest about.
Winston Churchill
(1874 – 1965) British prime minister, politician, statesman & orator
Characteristics
Insults
Opinion
About Clement Attlee
Modesty
Power tends to corrupt; absolute power corrupts absolutely.
Acton's Law
Characteristics
Murphy’s Laws
Absolute power
Corruption
Influence
I can resist everything except temptation.
Oscar Wilde
(1854 – 1900) Irish dramatist, novelist & poet
Characteristics
Resist
Temptation
It's far easier to forgive an enemy after you've got even with him.
Olin Miller
(1918 - 2002) American author
Characteristics
People
Enemies
Forgiveness
Revenge
If a man who cannot count finds a four-leaf clover, is he lucky?
Stanisław Lec
(1909 – 1966) Polish poet, writer & aphorist
Characteristics
Situations
Luck
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