Quotes and One Liners
humorous one-liners, quotations, jokes, Murphy's Laws & more
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Subject:
Characteristics
(Page 4)
Flattery is telling people exactly what they think of themselves.
Anonymous
Characteristics
People
Self
Flattery
A little sincerity is a dangerous thing, and a great deal of it is absolutely fatal.
Oscar Wilde
(1854 – 1900) Irish dramatist, novelist & poet
Characteristics
Honesty
Dangerous
Fatal
Sincerity
If one tells the truth, one is sure, sooner or later, to be found out.
Oscar Wilde
(1854 – 1900) Irish dramatist, novelist & poet
Characteristics
Honesty
Truth
He would kill his own mother just so that he could use her skin to make a drum to beat his own praises.
Margot Asquith
(1864 –1945) Anglo-Scottish socialite, author & wit
Characteristics
Insults
Mothers
About Winston Churchill
Conceit
I want to make a revolving door that says “Pull” on it, just see how obedient people are.
Demetri Martin
(1973 – ) American comedian
Characteristics
Obedience
Revolving doors
Wickedness is always easier than virtue; for it takes the short cut to everything.
Samuel Johnson
(1709 – 1784) English author, essayist, critic, editor & lexicographer
Characteristics
Bad
Good
Virtue
Wickedness
Duty is what one expects from others, it is not what one does oneself.
Oscar Wilde
(1854 – 1900) Irish dramatist, novelist & poet
Characteristics
People
Duty
Purpose
The man who can smile when things go wrong has thought of someone he can blame it on.
Jones's Law
Characteristics
Murphy’s Laws
Blame
Smiling
One should always play fairly when one has the winning cards.
Oscar Wilde
(1854 – 1900) Irish dramatist, novelist & poet
Activities
Characteristics
Games
Fairness
Winning cards
I’m willing to admit that I may not always be right, but I am never wrong.
Samuel Goldwyn
(1879 – 1974) film producer
Characteristics
Misspokements
Oxymorons
Right
Wrong
Prosperity is the best protector of principle.
Mark Twain
Samuel Clemens (1835 – 1910) author & humorist
Characteristics
Money
Principle
Prosperity
One thing that's good about procrastination is that you always have something planned for tomorrow.
Gladys Bronwyn Stern
(1890 – 1973) English writer & critic
Characteristics
Procrastination
I know how to do anything — I’m a mom.
Roseanne Barr
(1952 – ) comedian, actress & writer
Characteristics
Family
Mothers
Abilities
If you go to any book store and look at any book on marriage, you'll see at least one photo of me about to put an ice tray with only one ice cube left in it back into the refrigerator.
Darrell Hammond
(1955 – ) American actor, stand-up comedian & impressionist
Characteristics
Husbands
Marriage
Bad
My pessimism extends to the point of even suspecting the sincerity of the pessimists.
Jean Rostand
(1894 – 1977) French biologist & philosopher
Characteristics
Pessimism
Aren’t I lucky, to have survived so much bad luck.
Ashleigh Brilliant
(1933 – ) English author & cartoonist
Characteristics
Life
Luck
Surviving
The trouble with ignorance is that it picks up confidence as it goes along.
Anonymous
Characteristics
Intelligence
Confidence
Ignorance
The secret of staying young is to live honestly, eat slowly, and lie about your age.
Lucille Ball
(1911 – 1989) television actress
Age
Characteristics
Honesty
Lies
Old
Young
Every man has his follies – and often they are the most interesting thing he has got.
Josh Billings
(1818 – 1885) humorist
Characteristics
Intelligence
Follies
The man’s desire for a son is usually nothing but the wish to duplicate himself in order that such a remarkable pattern may not be lost to the world.
Helen Rowland
(1876 – 1950) journalist & humorist
Characteristics
Men
People
Relationships
Sons
Life is strange; every so often a good man wins.
Frank Dane
(1902 – 1963) Danish actor
Characteristics
Individuals
Life
People
Success
Good
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