Subject: Characteristics (Page 42)

Ellen Page says that the sexism in Hollywood is constant; you might remember her from her movie Juno, where she played a mouthy chick with no tits.

(1978 – ) American writer & stand-up comedian
Characteristics Hollywood Places

The sterile, arid environment created by truly jarring and discordant signage and gargantuan billboards is a turnoff.

(1946 – ) American comedian, actor & voice actor
Characteristics

Do not free a camel of the burden of his hump; you may be freeing him from being a camel.

(1874 – 1936) English author & mystery novelist
Characteristics

The meek shall inherit the earth, but not the mineral rights.

(1892 – 1976) oil industrialist (once world’s richest man)
Characteristics Money

There is no ‘I’ in self-esteem.

(1982 – ) American comedian & actress
Characteristics Self

It takes a real talent to be able to apologize in a manner that makes the offended person feel guilty.

Characteristics Communication

I’m not a politician and my other habits are good, also.

Charles Farrar Browne (1834 – 1867) humorist
Characteristics Government Politicians

A gentleman is one who never hurts anyone’s feelings unintentionally.

(1854 – 1900) Irish dramatist, novelist & poet
Characteristics People

A woman will lie about anything, just to stay in practice.

(1888 – 1959) detective novelist & screenwriter
Characteristics Honesty Lies People Women

In order to preserve your self-respect, it is sometimes necessary to lie and cheat.

(1930 – ) American author and billiard player, teacher & commentator
Characteristics Honesty Lies

Temptation is an irresistible force at work on a movable body.

(1880 – 1956) journalist, essayist, editor & satirist
Characteristics

Women with "pasts" interest men because men hope that history will repeat itself.

(1893 – 1980) actress, playwright, screenwriter & sex symbol
Characteristics Men Past People Women

McKinley has a chocolate eclair backbone.

(1858 – 1919) 26th U.S. president
Characteristics Insults

Patience is something you admire in the driver behind you and scorn in the one ahead.

Characteristics

Whenever A annoys or injures B on the pretense of saving or improving X, A is a scoundrel.

Characteristics Conflict Murphy’s Laws

Badness comes in waves.

Characteristics Murphy’s Laws

When we played softball, I’d steal second base, feel guilty and go back.

(1935 – ) movie actor, director & comedian
Characteristics Sports

Seriousness is stupidity sent to college.

(1947 – ) author, humorist & satirist
Characteristics

I get enough exercise just pushing my luck.

Activities Characteristics Exercise

Even on the most exalted throne in the world we are only sitting on our own bottom.

(1533 – 1592) French writer
Characteristics

Every word she writes is a lie, including "and" and "the."

(1912 – 1989) author, critic & political activist
Characteristics Honesty Insults Lies