Subject: Characteristics (Page 43)

He's a Republican housewife from Kansas with all the prejudices.

(1925 – 2012) author, playwright, essayist & screenwriter
Characteristics Insults

You may already be a loser!

(1921 – 2004) stand-up comedian & actor
Characteristics

The supreme irony of life is that hardly anyone gets out of it alive.

(1907 – 1988) science fiction author
Characteristics Death Life

Nothing makes it easier to resist temptation than a proper bringing-up, a sound set of values – and witnesses.

(1908 – 1980) businessman, humorist
Characteristics Situations

Pessimism: A philosophy forced upon the convictions of the observer by the disheartening prevalence of the optimist with his scarecrow hope and his unsightly smile.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Characteristics Communication Definitions Language

I was so naive as a kid I used to sneak behind the barn and do nothing.

(1925 – 2005) television host
Characteristics Children People Things

A gentleman is one who never hurts anyone’s feelings unintentionally.

(1854 – 1900) Irish dramatist, novelist & poet
Characteristics People

Hypocrisy is the Vaseline of social intercourse.

Characteristics Murphy’s Laws

Now the only thing I miss about sex is the cigarette afterward.

(1936 – ) novelist, essayist & columnist
Characteristics Sex

That which we call sin in others is experimentation for us.

(1803 – 1882) essayist, poet, & philosopher
Beliefs Characteristics

A bleeding heart can be hell on the carpeting.

David Gerrold (1944 – ) science fiction author
Body Characteristics Situations Things

Murphy was an optimist.

Characteristics Murphy’s Laws

Before you marry a person, you should first make them use a computer with slow internet service to see who they really are.

(1967 – ) American comedian, actor, producer & writer
Characteristics Marriage

I could see that, if not actually disgruntled, he was far from being gruntled.

(1881 – 1975) English writer & humorist
Characteristics

He’s crooked as a barrel full of fish hooks.

Characteristics Expressions Honesty Insults

The trouble with resisting temptation is it may never come your way again.

Characteristics Murphy’s Laws

Blessed is he who expects nothing, for he shall never be disappointed.

(1706 – 1790) American statesman, author, scientist & inventor
Characteristics

I was going to buy a copy of The Power of Positive Thinking, and then I thought: What the hell good would that do?

comedian
Books Characteristics Communication Reading/Writing

I ain’t got no respect for no religion where the head guy claims he can’t make no mistakes. Like he’s, waddya call, inflammable.

television character, All In the Family (Carroll O’Connor)
Characteristics Malaprops Mistakes

Trust everybody, but cut the cards.

Characteristics Murphy’s Laws

Deep down, I'm pretty superficial.

(1922 – 1990) American actress
Characteristics Misspokements