Subject: Characteristics (Page 45)

The difference between a moral man and a man of honor is that the latter regrets a discreditable act, even when it has worked and he has not been caught.

(1880 – 1956) journalist, essayist, editor & satirist
Characteristics

If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous, he will not bite you; this is the principal difference between dog and man.

Samuel Clemens (1835 – 1910) author & humorist
Animals Characteristics Dogs People

I’ve met a lot of hardboiled eggs in my time, but you’re twenty minutes.

(1906 – 2002) Austrian journalist, filmmaker, screenwriter & producer
Characteristics Insults

Don’t say yes until I finish talking.

(1902 – 1979) American film studio executive & producer
Characteristics Communication

Perfection is what American women expect to find in their husbands… but English women only hope to find in their butlers.

(1874 – 1965) English dramatist & novelist
America Characteristics England Husbands Women

The ladies looked one another over with microscopic carelessness.

(1886 – 1969) American journalist & humorist
Characteristics Situations

I Will Respect Your Opinion As Soon As You Stop Making Shit Up!

Beliefs Characteristics Facts Honesty Lies

The last person who quit or was fired will be held responsible for everything that goes wrong – until the next person quits or is fired.

Characteristics Murphy’s Laws Problems

When I was losing, they called me nuts; when I was winning they called me eccentric.

(1928 – 2001) American basketball coach
Characteristics Sports

Under pressure, people admit to murder, setting fire to the village church or robbing a bank, but never to being bores.

(1883 – 1963) American writer & hostess
Characteristics

Conscience gets a lot of credit that belongs to cold feet.

Characteristics

People who say they don't care what people think are usually desperate to have people think they don't care what people think.

(1937 – 2008) stand-up comedian, social critic, actor & author
Characteristics Opinion People

Egotism: Usually a case of mistaken nonentity.

(1907 – 1990) American actress
Characteristics Self

People who throw kisses are hopelessly lazy.

(1903 – 2003) English-born American comedian & actor
Characteristics

He’s so mean, he’d bite himself.

Characteristics Expressions

Most human beings have an almost infinite capacity for taking things for granted.

(1894 – 1963) English writer
Characteristics Miscellaneous

If I were two-faced, would I be wearing this one?

(1809 – 1865) 16th U.S. president
Appearance Body Characteristics

I couldn’t be a responsible enough parent if my kid was born with a new suit and a full-time job.

(1967 – ) American stand-up comedian & actor
Characteristics Self

Nixon's the kind of guy that if you were drowning 50 feet off shore, he'd throw you a 30 foot rope; then Kissinger would go on TV the next night and say that the President had met you more than half-way.

(1927 – ) Canadian-born American comedian & actor
Characteristics People

[Charm] is a way of getting the answer yes without having asked any clear question

(1913 – 1960) French-Algerian author, philosopher & journalist
Characteristics

An optimist thinks this is the best of all worlds; a pessimist fears the same may be true.

(1926 – ) newspaper columnist
Characteristics People