Subject: Characteristics (Page 48)

A positive attitude may not solve all your problems, but it will annoy enough people to make it worth the effort.

(1876 to 1944) German-American painter & lithographer
Characteristics

When the sun comes up, I have morals again.

(1952 – ) comedian
Characteristics Situations

I wear my heart on my sleeve… I wear my liver on my pant leg.


Appearance Body Characteristics Emotions Situations

Always willing to lend a helping hand to the one above him.

(1896 – 1940) American author of novels & short stories
Characteristics Insults

First of all you've got to have talent, and then you've got to marry her like I did.

(1896 – 1996) comedian, actor & entertainer
Characteristics Success

To be natural is such a very difficult pose to keep up.

(1854 – 1900) Irish dramatist, novelist & poet
Characteristics

Don't put off till tomorrow what can be enjoyed today.

(1818 – 1885) humorist
Characteristics Time

Borrow money from pessimists; they don't expect it back.

Characteristics Money

They've great respect for the dead in Hollywood, but none for the living.

(1909 – 1959) Australian-born American actor
Characteristics Hollywood Places

Whatever else can be said about sex, it cannot be called a dignified performance.

(1907 – 1982) American journalist, editor & author
Characteristics Sex

He’s so lazy he wouldn’t work in a pie factory.

Characteristics Expressions Work

A liberal is a man too broadminded to take his own side in a quarrel.

(1874 – 1963) American poet
Characteristics Conflict Government Politics

Be kind to your mother-in-law, but pay for her board at some good hotel.

(1818 – 1885) humorist
Characteristics Family

Everyone has a skeleton in their closet; the difference between Bill Clinton and myself is that he has a walk-in closet.

(1938 – ) political commentator, author, columnist, politician & broadcaster
Characteristics

Heaven goes by favor; for if it went by merit, you would stay out and your dog would go in.

Samuel Clemens (1835 – 1910) author & humorist
Animals Beliefs Characteristics Dogs

I have no sex appeal and it has screwed me up for life; my gynecologist examines me by telephone.

(1935 – 2014) American comedian, television personality, writer & director
Characteristics Self Sex

Even on the most exalted throne in the world we are only sitting on our own bottom.

(1533 – 1592) French writer
Characteristics

Man will occasionally stumble over the truth, but most of the time he will pick himself up and continue on.

Characteristics Murphy’s Laws Truth

When science finally locates the center of the universe, some people will be surprised to learn they’re not it.

(1916 – 1996) American comic book artist
Characteristics

I have met a lot of hardboiled eggs in my time, but you’re twenty minutes.

(1854 – 1900) Irish dramatist, novelist & poet
Characteristics Insults

Only a mediocre person is always at his best.

(1874 – 1965) English dramatist & novelist
Characteristics