Quotes and One Liners
humorous one-liners, quotations, jokes, Murphy's Laws & more
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Subject:
Characteristics
(Page 6)
Be good and you will be lonely.
Mark Twain
Samuel Clemens (1835 – 1910) author & humorist
Characteristics
People
Self
Good
Lonely
He who slings mud generally loses ground.
Adlai E. Stevenson
(1900 – 1965) diplomat & Democratic politician
Characteristics
Communication
Tis more blessed to give than to receive; for example, wedding presents.
H.L. Mencken
(1880 – 1956) journalist, essayist, editor & satirist
Characteristics
Giving
Receiving
Wedding presents
Style, is like a frog: you can dissect the thing, but it somehow dies in process.
Arthur Quinn
writer
Characteristics
Style
Only a mediocre person is always at his best.
Maugham's Thought
Characteristics
Murphy’s Laws
Mediocrity
Some people pay a compliment as if they expected a receipt.
Frank ‘Kin’ Hubbard
(1868 – 1930) cartoonist, humorist & journalist
Characteristics
Communication
People
Compliments
He's [Frank Sinatra] the kind of guy that when he dies, he's going up to heaven and give God a bad time for making him bald.
Marlon Brando
(1924 – 2004) American actor
Characteristics
Insults
Frank Sinatra
He was born silly and had a relapse.
Arthur ‘Bugs’ Baer
(1886 – 1969) American journalist & humorist
Characteristics
Silliness
Our ego is our silent partner – too often with a controlling interest.
Cullen Hightower
(1923 – ) American quote & quip writer
Characteristics
People
Self
Egotism
Silent partner
That which we call sin in others is experimentation for us.
Ralph Waldo Emerson
(1803 – 1882) essayist, poet, & philosopher
Beliefs
Characteristics
Experiments
Sin
I’m told he’s [a] decent sort when you get to know him, but no one ever has, so his decency is sort of secret.
Tom Stoppard
(1937 – ) British playwright & screenwriter
Characteristics
A woman will lie about anything, just to stay in practice.
Raymond Chandler
(1888 – 1959) detective novelist & screenwriter
Characteristics
Honesty
Lies
People
Women
Hope is the feeling you have that the feeling you have isn't permanent.
Jean Kerr
(1922 – 2003) author & playwright
Characteristics
Time
Feeling
Hope
Never trust a husband too far or a bachelor too near.
Helen Rowland
(1876 – 1950) journalist & humorist
Characteristics
Husbands
Marriage
People
Bachelor
Trust
I used to be indecisive… but I'm not sure.
Anonymous
Characteristics
Indecision
Oxymorons
No vice is so bad as advice.
Marie Dressler
(1868 – 1934) Canadian-American actress
Characteristics
Advice
Vice
A hypocrite is a person who – but who isn't?
Don Marquis
(1878 – 1937) humorist, journalist & author
Characteristics
People
Hypocrite
Gain a modest reputation for being unreliable and you will never be asked to do a thing.
Paul Theroux
(1941 – ) novelist
Characteristics
Situations
Reliability
He has all the characteristics of a dog except loyalty.
Sam Houston
(1793 – 1863) American politician, statesman & soldier
Animals
Characteristics
Dogs
Insults
About politician Thomas Jefferson Green
You could start an argument in an empty house.
Anonymous
Characteristics
Expressions
Argumentative
Somewhere between the Angels and the French lies the rest of humanity.
Mark Twain
Samuel Clemens (1835 – 1910) author & humorist
Characteristics
People
Angels
French
Humanity
Page 6 of 50
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