Subject: Classifieds (Page 19)

Not everyone appearing in this column is a deranged cross-dressing sociopath. Let me know if you find one and I'll strangle him with my bra. Man, 56.

Classifieds

American Legion Auxilary Unit 3 – Oct. 9 4 p.m. Spaghetti Dinner With Salad, Bread, And Dessert $5.00 $5,50 Take Out – 2nd Thurs. Of Every Monday

Classifieds

FOR SALE: Cemetery needs. Monuments, Sales, Dating, Letterings. Call Dennis Leibfried before you go. Ph.507…

Classifieds

Found: Keys at the Diversion Cam rest stop with fob that says "Keys I Haven't Lost Yet."

Classifieds

JAZZY 1103 ultra power chair $200. 5 piece monogamy bedroom set $800.

Classifieds

Illiterate? Write today for free help.

Classifieds

ALZHEIMER'S CENTER PREPARES FOR AN AFFAIR TO REMEMBER.

Classifieds

Perfection in Mountain Park Ranch – Pride Of Ownership 3 BR – 2 Ba – Open & Spacious – Upgraded Neutral Flooring – Split Bedroom Plan – Ceiling In Every Room…

Classifieds

FOR SALE: Instant coffee table

Classifieds

Bastard. Complete and utter. Whatever you do, don't reply – you'll only regret it.

Classifieds

TO LET: 4 bedroom house close to town. No poets.

Classifieds

HARRY POTTERY – Movie posters, set of three, Sorcerer’s Stone. Mint condition. $40. Call…

Classifieds

WANTED – Workaholic for special department, all shifts. Highly reliable – no vacation or sick leave. Must be flexible, intelligent and friendly.

Classifieds

This ad may not be the best lonely heart in the world, nor its author the best-smelling. That's all I have to say. Man, 37.

Classifieds

Beautiful uncommon African follis dish, 550,00,000 yrs. old, $45.

Classifieds

Save it. Anything you've got to say can be said to my lawyer. But if you're not my ex-wife, why not write to box no. 5377? I enjoy vodka, canasta, evenings in, and cold, cold revenge.

Classifieds

Free 1 can of pork & beans with purchase of 3 br 2 bth home.

Classifieds

WANTED: Man to wash dishes and two waitresses.

Classifieds

Rubber woman almost new used only 3Xs $10 OBO. 879-….

Classifieds

A-Whole Chiropractic • Body Injury Experts • Auto/Work Accidents…

Classifieds

Help Wanted – “Must dominate the English language” – Call: (917) 797-….

Classifieds