Subject: Classifieds (Page 22)

FOUND: Large, Obese Goldfish, 11 years old, blind as a bat

For Sale: Black Tuxedo only worn once and now divorced.

Free Yorkshire terrier. 8 years old. Hateful little dog. Bites.

2008 Cherokee Lardo “Diesel” …

2009 Happy New Years Special – Be Fit! Be Strong! – Taekwondo classes… Cardio Dick Boxing classes…

Fresh-Cut CHRISTMAS TREES Arriving December 28th – We Carry the Fullest Freshest Trees Available…

All day starting at 1 PM. – Shuck N' Jive's Annual Crawfish Boil

Personal Announcements: S. Paraskos and Helen Walker would like to announce that they are no longer engaged.
Engagement: S.Paraskos of Paphos, Cyprus, and Nicola Jared of UK would like to announce their engagement. – Cyprus Weekly

Shakespeare's Pizza. Free chopsticks.

Selection As Big As The North Pole.

ETERNAL ASCENT – sends cremated remains to the heavens in a special balloon. Let us help make your loved one’s final journey a memorable one. We also release pets. Call 800-808-….

Hummels – largest selection ever – "If it's in stock, we have it!"

FOR SALE – Diamonds $20; microscopes $15.

Mature gentleman, 62, aged well, noble grey looks, fit and active, sound mind and unfazed by the fickle demands of modern society seeks… damn it, I have to pee again.

Corduroy Pillows: They're making headlines!

A-Whole Chiropractic • Body Injury Experts • Auto/Work Accidents…

FOR SALE: Doctor’s sailing dinghy and accessories. Doctor no further use.

Advanced Products, Inc. • 605 East Robins, Conway, Arkansas 72032 • 10% Satisfaction Guaranteed • DIRECTIONS – Take 1 to 3 tablets daily after breakfast as a dietary supplement.

Get 50% off or half price, whichever is less.

FOR SALE in excellent condition, $100. Call…

Ordervs – Veggie Trays – Dips and much more