Subject: Classifieds (Page 23)

Harrisburg Postal Employees Gun Club

Buy one restraining order, get one free!

Wednesday, March 25 – Drive-thru colorectal screening, 9-11 am. at Passavant Area Hospital…

For Sale: Black Tuxedo only worn once and now divorced.

Fresh-Cut CHRISTMAS TREES Arriving December 28th – We Carry the Fullest Freshest Trees Available…

A BIG THANK YOU! To all the people that stopped to help the injured Ostrich on Hwy 2 Weest. We will be having an Ostrich tasting at THE RANCH on Sunday Aug 9, 1–5 PM. All are invited, children welcome, no pets please, 29 miles west on Hwy 2 854-….

PROVED! Make Bedwetting Easier… Waterproof Mattress Protector $19.95

TALENT SEARCH – Can you BURP or FART better than your friends? We want to talk. BIG $$ Call us @ 770-….

A Race to Savings! – with Thank You Card – $119 – without card $2.39

Views plus spacious 1554 sq. ft. home with large lot, family room with fireplace, huge dick for entertaining? …

Call 800-826-8086 (Central Time) – RTPatch® Professional

1995 NISSAN Maxima, green, leather, loaded, CD, auto start, sunroof, 4-door, good condition, $4500. Not for sale.

If you have one of these symptoms, please call this 800 number – Death, Heartburn, …

HARRY POTTERY – Movie posters, set of three, Sorcerer’s Stone. Mint condition. $40. Call…

Help wanted, adult or mature teenager to baby-sit. One dollar an hour.

20 dozen bottles of excellent Old Tawny Port, sold to pay for charges, the owner having lost sight of, and bottled by us last year.

Shakespeare's Pizza. Free chopsticks.

… 2 Days Only! – Thursday, Friday, Saturday & Sunday – November 3, 4, 5 & 6…

My husband, who hardly ever listens to the radio anymore, has this one on all the time.

Are you Kate Bush?’ Write to obsessive man (36). Note, people who aren't Kate Bush need not respond.

HAMSTERS free. Call Allen’s Mom … – HAMSTERS $1.00 each. Call Allen …