Subject: Classifieds (Page 26)

For Sale: Black Tuxedo only worn once and now divorced.

Classifieds

Righteous Kill – Pacino & Deniro play veteran cops on the trail of a cereal killer…

Classifieds

06’ Suzuki GSXR 1000 • Fourways, Johannesburg – This bike is perfect! Only done 7000 kms and has had its 1500 km. dealer service. No falls/scratches. I use it as a cruiser/commuter. I’m selling it because it was purchased without proper consent of a loving wife. Apparently “do whatever the f**k you want” doesn’t mean what I thought. Call me, Steve. (011) 867-….

Classifieds

Get 50% off or half price, whichever is less.

Classifieds

Information – MENTALLY ILL NEEDED – To interview for Novel. Must be successful & interesting. Email: …@trsemail… (614) 537-….

Classifieds

GE – Working electric self-cleaning oven/stove, $150, needs good cleaning.

Classifieds

Wanted: Limo driver needed for overnight transport of drunk and drugged up clients.

Classifieds

CARL’S OXFORD DINER – Mention This Ad for a Free Ice Water – 291 Main St. Oxford

Classifieds

Lustful? Sinful? Sexual? These are all words not used in conjunction with my feeble, limp form for at least 32 years. You are a woman to 40 with high class looks and low class mind. I am an ever growing vessel of limp wristed sexual energy just waiting to be shook. You may call me sir. box no. 32/02

Classifieds

BEAUTIFUL ENGAGEMENT ring. Yellow gold, wide band with 18 diamonds set in 3 rows of 3 diamonds on each side of one large round-cut center stone. worn, sparingly, for only 9 Days. “It Didn’t Mean Anything. It was just suppose to Shut Her Up.” It didn’t shut her up. Happy to be Rid of it too. For the first offer of $800.00. Phone… between 9 a.m. – 9 p.m.

Classifieds

FOR SALE: Doctor’s sailing dinghy and accessories. Doctor no further use.

Classifieds

Found: Keys at the Diversion Cam rest stop with fob that says "Keys I Haven't Lost Yet."

Classifieds

Not everyone appearing in this column is a deranged cross-dressing sociopath. Let me know if you find one and I'll strangle him with my bra. Man, 56.

Classifieds

It Takes Many Ingredients to Make Burger King Great But… “The Secret Ingredient is our People”

Classifieds

Used Tombstone, perfect for someone named Homer HendelBergenHeinzel. One only.

Classifieds

This is the model home for your future. It was panned by Better Homes and Gardens.

Classifieds

Hummels – largest selection ever – "If it's in stock, we have it!"

Classifieds

Remote Controlled Genitalia – Think of all the fun you’ll have!!! …

Classifieds

Your stars for today: A pretty Cancerian, 35, will cook you a lovely meal, caress your hair softly, then squeeze every damn penny from your adulterous bank account before slashing the tires of your Beamer. Let that serve as a warning. Now then, risotto?

Classifieds

20 dozen bottles of excellent Old Tawny Port, sold to pay for charges, the owner having lost sight of, and bottled by us last year.

Classifieds

Save regularly in our bank. You'll never reget it.

Classifieds