Subject: Classifieds (Page 4)

IMPORTANT! IMPORTANT! Anyone who has had a bone scan within the last 5 years where your knees have been strapped to your crotch with a 6” belt, please call (815) 522-….

Sean – You are such a disappointment to the entire family – don’t bother coming home. Love, Dad

Tooth Whitening – For Any One Getting Married We Offer Nitrous Oxide Sedation – Call us today for details…

Washing machine: free to good home.

2 wire mesh butchering gloves, 1 5-finger, 1 3-finger, pair: $15

Creative daily specials, including select offerings of beef, foul, fresh vagetables, salads, quiche.

Save regularly in our bank. You'll never reget it.

Semi-Annual after-Christmas Sale.

For sale, Hope Chest, brand new, half off, long story.

Lost: small apricot poodle. Reward. Neutered. Like one of the family.

March 8th – Hypnotist Frank Santos – Donation $10 – All you can eat – Bring your own food – Starts at 8pm…

Potty Chair, solid oak, light brown stain. $20

These items may or may not be available at all times, and sometimes not at all and other times all the time.

FOR SALE: One pair hardly used dentures, only 2 teeth missing. $100 OBO. Call Ira…

Dog for sale: eats anything and is fond of children.

2009 Happy New Years Special – Be Fit! Be Strong! – Taekwondo classes… Cardio Dick Boxing classes…

For Sale: Black Tuxedo only worn once and now divorced.

FREE TO GOOD HOME – Beautiful 6 mo. old male kitten — orange & caramel tabby, playful, friendly very affectionate, ideal for family w/ kids. OR Handsome 32 yr. old husband – personable, funny, good job, but doesn't like cats. Says he goes or cat goes. Call Jennifer 265-…. — come see both and decide which you'd like.

SUBURBAN – SEE WAL-MART! From your private deck, high in the hills of Wyomissing! 5 BRs, 2 fpls. Spacious floor plan! $269,900.

Turkey Shoot Slated – The Malheur Gun Club will hold a turkey shoot Sunday at the Vale Airport… Winners will receive hams.

HELP WANTED – PlayStation Brand Ambassador