Subject: Colemanballs

Colemanballs:

A term coined by British magazine “Private Eye,” to describe verbal gaffes, errors or misuse of words and phrases spoken by British football (soccer) announcers, coaches or players – initially BBC broadcaster David Coleman and the suffix -balls, as in “to balls up” or make a mistake.

There’s Jermaine Defoe, checking the weather on his phone no doubt… he’s a lovely boy.

English football player, manager & sports commentator
Colemanballs

Howard Kahn, a lecturer at Edinburgh’s Heriot Watt University, has studied the matter intently and says he’s figured out why Scottish soccer teams can’t seem to win World Cup and other competitions; they’re not good players.

Colemanballs

He put it just where he meant it and it passed the Luxembourg goal post by 18 inches.

British commentator
Colemanballs

Solskjaer never misses the target; that time he hit the post.

Danish football player
Colemanballs

I’ve just noticed something interesting; the left and right backs have both got long sleeve shirts on.

English football player, manager & sports commentator
Colemanballs

The midfield picks itself: Beckham, Scholes, Gerrard and A.N. Other.

English football player
Colemanballs

It’s a great advantage to be able to hurdle with both legs.

(1926 – ) English sports commentator
Colemanballs Misspokements Sports

Socrates, so named because his father was interested in Greek mythology.

Colemanballs

There are so many teams now down at the bottom of the Third Division; the FA really has to do something about it.

Scottish football player
Colemanballs

In fact that's Swindon's first win of any kind in nine matches.

(1926 – ) English sports commentator
Colemanballs

And there’s the unmistakable figure of Joe Mercer… or is it Lester Piggott.

British horse racing commentator
Colemanballs

Emmanuel Petit has won more medals than any other player in the Premiership this year, although Patrick Vieira’s won the same medals.

British sports journalist
Colemanballs

The Blackburn crowd have been saturated by fifty thousand Newcastle fans.

Colemanballs

Romania are more Portuguese than German.

English football player & commentator
Colemanballs

I can see the carrot at the end of the tunnel.

English football player
Colemanballs Mixed metaphors

He’s good at that, David Beckham; he’s good at kicking the ball.

English football player & manager
Colemanballs

It’s got nothing to do with his ability… in fact, it has got to do with his ability.

English football player & commentator
Colemanballs

If there’s a weakness in Chelsea’s defense, it’s in their defense.

Colemanballs

If ever a goal ever needed a game, this is it.

British football player & broadcaster
Colemanballs

We don’t have to play them every week, although we do play them next week.

British football commentator
Colemanballs

And now we have the formalities over, we'll have the National Anthems.

English football player & commentator
Colemanballs