Subject: Communication » Language (Page 17)

I hope God speaks English; if I get up to heaven and have to point at a menu, I'm gonna be pissed.

(1975 – ) American stand-up comedian & television host
Beliefs Communication Eating God Language

Armor: The kind of clothing worn by a man whose tailor is a blacksmith.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Clothing Communication Definitions Language

Avant-garde? … That’s French for bullshit.

(1940 – 1980) English rock musician, singer & songwriter
Communication Language

My goal in life is to open up a nail salon in Vietnam, where all my workers speak nothing but English.

American-Mexican stand-up comedian & actress
Communication Language Places

I am a bear of very little brain, and long words bother me.

fictional character from the book series by A. A. Milne
Communication Language Reading/Writing

Consolation: The knowledge that a better man is more unfortunate than yourself.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Communication Definitions Language

A synonym is a word you use when you can’t spell the other one.


Communication Language

The first man to compare the cheeks of a young woman to a rose was obviously a poet; the first to repeat it was possibly an idiot.

(1904 – 1989) Spanish surrealist painter
Fools Intelligence Language

Like other occult techniques of divination, the statistical method has a private jargon deliberately contrived to obscure its methods from nonpractitioners.

Communication Language Murphy’s Laws Science/Weather

Mercy: An attribute beloved of detected offenders.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Characteristics Communication Definitions Language

I think one of the most groundbreaking inventions of all time is the jackhammer.

(1973 – ) American comedian
Communication Language Things

Its important to use apostrophe's right.

Communication Language Murphy’s Laws Reading/Writing

Congratulation: The civility of envy.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Communication Definitions Language

You can say ‘Thanks,’ and you can say ‘Thanks a Million’ – but any number in between? … uhuh.

(1973 – ) American comedian
Communication Language

The fury engendered by the misspelling of a name in a (newspaper) column is in direct ratio to the obscurity of the mentionee.

Anger Characteristics Language Murphy’s Laws Reading/Writing

Is "tired old cliche" one?


Communication Language

Positive: Mistaken at the top of one's voice.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Communication Definitions Language Speech

I was recently on a tour of Latin America, and the only regret I have was that I didn’t study Latin harder in school so I could converse with those people.

(1947 – ) U.S. vice president & politician
Communication Language Misspokements Places

Absurdity: A statement or belief manifestly inconsistent with one's own opinion.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Communication Definitions Language Opinion

When cheese gets it's picture taken, what does it say?

(1937 – 2008) stand-up comedian, social critic, actor & author
Communication Food/Drink Language

Plagiarize: To take the thought or style of another writer whom one has never, never read.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Communication Definitions Language Reading/Writing