Subject: Communication » Language (Page 9)

If crime fighters fight crime and fire fighters fight fire, what do freedom fighters fight?

(1937 – 2008) stand-up comedian, social critic, actor & author
Communication Language

Always and never are two words you should always remember never to use.

(1906 – 1965) psychologist & speech pathologist
Communication Language

Delegation: In American politics, an article of merchandise that comes in sets.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Communication Definitions Government Language

1. Never use one word when a dozen will suffice.
2. If it can be understood, it's not finished yet.
3. Never be the first to do anything.

Communication Language Murphy’s Laws

Mausoleum: The final and funniest folly of the rich.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Communication Death Definitions Language Money Wealth

I keep reading between the lies.

(Aiskowitz) (1899 – 1982) humorist
Characteristics Language Lies Truth

Pulled my groin the other day – for about 20 minutes.

(1963 – ) American comedian
Activities Language Sex

It is more fun to talk with someone who doesn’t use long, difficult words but rather short, easy words like “What about lunch?”

fictional character from the book series by A. A. Milne
Communication Eating Language People Speech

Hector Torres, how can you communicate with Enzo Hernandez when he speaks Spanish and you speak Mexican?

(1924 – 2014) American baseball player & announcer
Communication Language Misspokements

Loquacity: A disorder which renders the sufferer unable to curb his tongue when you wish to talk.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Communication Conversation Definitions Language Speech

Interpreter: A ventriloquist using two dummies.

Communication Definitions Language

I saw a documentary on how ships are kept together; it was riveting.

Canadian stand-up comedian, actor & writer
Communication Language

Why does your nose run and your feet smell?

Appearance Body Language

Don't use a run-on sentence you got to punctuate it.

Communication Language Murphy’s Laws Reading/Writing

Status quo, you know, that is Latin for the mess we’re in.

(1911 – 2004) 40th U.S. president & actor
Communication Language Misspokements Problems Speech

She went into the hospital after being bitten by a spider in a bathing suit.

(1908 – 1997) German-born teacher, academic & humorist
Language Misspokements

This sign says “IMPROV,” but I had a bad set on Friday night, so yesterday they put an “E” on the end of it.

(1968 – 2005) American stand-up comedian
Communication Language

There is a very fine line between 'hobby' and 'mental illness.

Communication Health Language

Today I held the elevator door open for a spastic… sorry that’s an inappropriate word for this site, I meant ‘lift.’

Canadian stand-up comedian, actor & writer
Communication Language

Aardvark: In the beginning was the word. And the word was ‘Aardvark.’

Communication Definitions Language

Coward: One who in a perilous emergency thinks with his legs.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Communication Definitions Language