Subject: Communication (Page 35)

The report of my death was an exaggeration.

Samuel Clemens (1835 – 1910) author & humorist
Communication Death Exaggerations

A kiss is a lovely trick designed by nature to stop speech when words become superfluous.


Communication Speech

I want to take one of those English as a Second Language courses – just go in and blow everybody away on the first day.

(1962 – ) American actor & comedian
Communication Language

When in doubt, ascribe all quotations to Bernard Shaw.

(1944 – ) English writer & broadcaster
Communication Language Reading/Writing

Hou know what always captures my eye… short people with umbrellas.

(1973 – ) English writer & stand-up comedian
Communication Wordplay

Obesity: A surplus gone to waist.

Appearance Body Definitions Fat Wordplay

He makes his living from ham to mouth.

(1836 – 1911) English dramatist, librettist, poet & illustrator
Communication Reading/Writing Wordplay

Interpreter: One who enables two persons of different languages to understand each other by repeating to each what it would have been to the interpreter’s advantage for the other to have said.

Communication Definitions Language

Just think of something stupid to say and then don't say it.

(1911 – 1980) humorist, writer, television host & journalist
Communication Intelligence Speech

If at first you don’t succeed, read the manual.

Murphy’s Laws Reading/Writing

I dislike censorship; like an appendix it is useless when inert and dangerous when active.

(1911 – 1975) British politician
Beliefs Communication

I do all my writing in bed; everybody knows I do my best work there.

(1893 – 1980) actress, playwright, screenwriter & sex symbol
Places Reading/Writing

Groan: An expression of appreciation for the horrible.

Communication Definitions Speech

Admiration: Our polite recognition of another's resemblance to ourselves.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Characteristics Communication Definitions Language Self

The difference between the right word and the almost right word is the difference between lightning and a lightning bug.

Samuel Clemens (1835 – 1910) author & humorist
Communication Language

There's a statue of Jimmy Stewart in the Hollywood Wax Museum, and the statue talks better than he does.

(1917 – 1995) singer, actor & comedian
Communication Speech

As my mother always says, “If you have to swear to get laughs, then you’re obviously a c**t.”

(1972 – ) Irish stand-up comedian, voice over artist & actor
Communication Emotions Laughter Speech

I'm the master of low expectations.

(1946 – ) 43rd U.S. president
Communication Language

Urinalysis: The study of pissed off people.

Definitions Health Wordplay

A pin has as much head as some authors and a good deal more point.

(1802 – 1870) American writer & editor
Communication Occupations Reading/Writing Work

Physician: One upon whom we set our hopes when ill and our dogs when well.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Communication Definitions Health Language