Subject: Communication (Page 37)

You do not really understand something unless you can explain it to your grandmother.

(1879 – 1955) German-born physicist
Communication Intelligence Understanding

Sparky is the only guy I know who’s written more books than he has read.

baseball broadcaster
Misspokements Reading/Writing Sports

My wife said: ‘I want an explanation and I want the truth.’ I said: ‘Make up your mind.’

(1906 – 1998) English-born American comedian
Communication Honesty Marriage Truth Wives

When a person tells you, “I’ll think it over and let you know” — you know.

(1918 - 2002) American author
Communication Situations

Matrimony: The splice of life.

Definitions Marriage Wordplay

A newspaper is a circulating library with high blood pressure.

(1886 – 1969) American journalist & humorist
Communication Health Reading/Writing

The sumptuousnss of a company's annual report is in inverse proportion to its profitability that year.

Books Communication Murphy’s Laws Reading/Writing

One good turn gets most of the blanket.

Communication Murphy’s Laws

Cynic: A man who sees things as they are, not as they ought to be.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Communication Definitions Language

Winston has devoted the best years of his life to preparing his impromptu speeches.

(1872 – 1930) British statesman, politician & lawyer
Insults Speech

Intelligent conversationalist: One who nods his head in agreement while you’re talking.

Communication Conversation Definitions Intelligence Speech

The phrase, “Don’t take this the wrong way” has a zero percent success rate.

(1973 – ) American writer, stand-up comedian, actor, director & producer
Communication

If I had a dollar for every time I said that, I'd be making money in a very weird way.

(1968 – 2005) American stand-up comedian
Communication Money Speech

In Paris they simply stared when I spoke to them in French; I never did succeed in making those idiots understand their language.

Samuel Clemens (1835 – 1910) author & humorist
Communication Language Speech Success

When I give a lecture, I accept that people look at their watches, but what I do not tolerate is when they look at it and raise it to their ear to find out if it stopped.

(1899 – 1974) French screenwriter, teacher & journalist
Communication Situations Speech Time

Talking with you is sort of the conversational equivalent of an out of body experience.

(1955 – ) cartoonist (Calvin and Hobbes)
Communication Conversation Speech

A critic is a bunch of biases held loosely together by a sense of taste.

(1926 – 2007) American jazz critic & book reviewer
Communication Death Occupations Work

Research is reading two books that have never been read in order to write a third that will never be read.

Books Communication Intelligence Murphy’s Laws Reading/Writing

My teacher used to say I wasn't very observant… to be honest, that was her opinion.

Canadian stand-up comedian, actor & writer
Communication Language

The trouble with talking too fast is you may say something you haven't thought of yet.

(1918 – 2002) advice columnist
Communication Speech

Tears: Remorse code.

Definitions Wordplay