Subject: Communication (Page 44)

Nothing but old fags and cabbage-stumps of quotations from the Bible and the rest, stewed in the juice of deliberate, journalistic dirty-mindedness.

(1885 – 1930) English novelist, poet, playwright, essayist, literary critic & painter
Communication Insults

What can I say about Milton Berle that he already hasn't said himself?

(1896 – 1996) comedian, actor & entertainer
Characteristics Opinion Speech

Your manuscript is both good and original, but the part that is good is not original and the part that is original is not good.

(1709 – 1784) English author, essayist, critic, editor & lexicographer
Communication Reading/Writing Reviews/Criticism

Is a hippopotamus a hippopotamus, or just a really cool Opotamus?

(1968 – 2005) American stand-up comedian
Animals Communication Language

Nothing is as frustrating as arguing with someone who knows what he's talking about.

(1920 – 2001) American writer & humorist
Communication Intelligence Speech

At school the other kids used to push me around and call me lazy; I loved that wheelchair.

Canadian stand-up comedian, actor & writer
Communication Wordplay

I had a paper route when I was a kid and I was supposed to go to 2,000 houses… or two dumpsters.

(1968 – 2005) American stand-up comedian
Communication Work

Umm, trouble with grammar have I, yes?

Movie character in, Star Wars (Frank Oz)
Communication Language TV/Movie Quotes

My method is to take the utmost trouble to find the right thing to say, and then to say it with the utmost levity.

(1856 – 1950) Irish playwright & socialist
Communication Emotions Speech

I have been told by hospital authorities that more copies of my works are left behind by departing patients than those of any other author.

(1889 – 1945) actor, author & humorist
Books Communication Health Reading/Writing

My wife has a slight impediment in her speech; every now and then she stops to breathe.

(1893 – 1980) American singer, pianist, comedian & actor
Communication Speech

Those who say truth is stranger than fiction have wasted their time on poorly written fiction.

Samuel Clemens (1835 – 1910) author & humorist
Books Characteristics Communication Reading/Writing Truth

I don’t want to tell you how much insurance I carry with the Prudential, but all I can say is: when I go, they go too.

(1894 – 1974) comedian, radio & television host
Communication Money

I believe in the right to arm bears.

(1927 – 1997) Am. comedian & satirist notable for mock presidential campaign
Beliefs Opinion Wordplay

Its important to use apostrophe's right.

Communication Language Murphy’s Laws Reading/Writing

A writer is somebody for whom writing is more difficult than it is for other people.

(1914 – 1953) Welsh-born poet & writer
Communication Reading/Writing

Antibody: Against everyone.

Definitions Wordplay

Most wives are like ventriloquists: they stand there nodding while the dummy does all the talking.

fictional mascot and cover boy of Mad, an American humor magazine
Communication Marriage Speech Wives

Groan: An expression of appreciation for the horrible.

Communication Definitions Speech

Polygamy – the art of  parrot-folding.

comic actor-writer
Communication Definitions Wordplay

Like I always say, there's no 'I' in "team;" there is a 'me', though, if you jumble it up."

(1959 – ) Canadian-born writer & television producer
Communication Language