Subject: Communication (Page 51)

A writer is somebody for whom writing is more difficult than it is for other people.

(1914 – 1953) Welsh-born poet & writer
Communication Reading/Writing

Do infants enjoy infancy as much as adults enjoy adultery?

(1937 – 2008) stand-up comedian, social critic, actor & author
Happiness Language People Sex

Always read something that will make you look good if you die in the middle of it.

(1947 – ) author, humorist & satirist
Books Communication Death Reading/Writing

Anything worth taking seriously is worth making fun of.

Communication

If the police arrest a mime, do they tell him he has the right to remain silent?

(1937 – 2008) stand-up comedian, social critic, actor & author
Communication Law People Speech

A metaphor is like a simile.


Communication Language

The penis mightier than the sword.

Samuel Clemens (1835 – 1910) author & humorist
Communication Wordplay

It's from lack of practice.

(1763 – 1855) English poet
Communication

Say what you will about the Ten Commandments, you must always come back to the pleasant fact that there are only ten of them.

(1880 – 1956) journalist, essayist, editor & satirist
Beliefs Communication Reading/Writing Religion

Never position a rock near a hard place.

(1962 – ) English writer
Communication Situations Wordplay

My theory [is] that modern science was largely conceived of as an answer to the servant problem and that it is generally practiced by those who lack a flair for conversation.

(1950 – ) writer & humorist
Science/Weather Speech

The person who writes for fools is always sure of a large audience.

(1788 – 1860) German philosopher
Communication Reading/Writing

It’s not that the world that’s got so much worse, but the news coverage that’s got so much better.

(1874 – 1936) English author & mystery novelist
Communication

It would be hard to be friends with Stephen Hawking because Stephen Hawking, you know, sounds like a robot and if you phoned him and he answered, you'd be like, 'Oh great, got the machine again' – and hang up.

Canadian comedian & actor
Communication Situations Speech

I’ve read some of your modern free verse and wonder who set it free.

(1882 – 1942) American actor
Communication Reading/Writing Shopping

Matrimony: The splice of life.

Definitions Marriage Wordplay

Vital papers will demonstrate their vitality by spontaneously moving from where you left them to where you can't find them.

Communication Murphy’s Laws

Trying to squash a rumor is like trying to unring a bell.

(1925 – 2005) American journalist
Communication

Check to see if you any words out.

Communication Language Murphy’s Laws Reading/Writing

The reason why so few good books are written is that so few people who can write know anything.

(1826 – 1877) English economist & journalist
Books Communication Reading/Writing

And don't use conjunctions to start sentences.

Communication Language Reading/Writing