Subject: Communication (Page 61)

He would come in and say he changed his mind… which was a gilded figure of speech, because he didn't have any.

Samuel Clemens (1835 – 1910) author & humorist
Communication Intelligence Language Mind

The baby wakes up in the wee wee hours of the morning.

Children Family Wordplay

He is not only dull himself, he is the cause of dullness in others.

(1720 – 1777) British dramatist, actor & theatre manager
Communication Insults

Henry Kissinger may be a great writer, but anyone finishes his book is definitely a great reader.

(1952 – ) American writer & biographer
Communication People Reading/Writing

I can take any amount of criticism so long as it is unqualified praise.

(1899 – 1973) English playwright, actor, composer, director & songwriter
Communication People Self

Generally speaking, my wife is generally speaking.

(1906 – 1998) English-born American comedian
Communication Marriage Speech Wives

For three days after death, hair and fingernails continue to grow but phone calls taper off.

(1925 – 2005) television host
Communication Death Hair Time

A rule of thumb in the matter of medical advice is to take everything any doctor says with a grain of aspirin.


Doctors Health Wordplay

It is a cliché that most clichés are true, but then like most clichés, that cliché is untrue.

(1957 – ) English actor, writer, journalist, comedian & film director
Communication Language

Linguist: A person who can be misunderstood in many languages.

Communication Definitions Language

Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?

(1937 – 2008) stand-up comedian, social critic, actor & author
Language Money

Bill wrote a book at Yale; I read one.

(1946 – ) 43rd U.S. president
Books Communication Reading/Writing

Eulogy: Praise of a person who has either the advantages of wealth and power, or the consideration to be dead.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Communication Definitions Language

Nothing risqué nothing gained!

(1933 – 1967) American actress, entertainer & Hollywood sex symbol
Communication Sex Wordplay

Pushing fifty is exercise enough


Activities Age Exercise Wordplay

English painter & sculptor Frederic Leighton to James McNeill Whistler: My dear Whistler, you leave your pictures in such a sketchy, unfinished state. Why don't you ever finish them?

Whistler’s reply: My dear Leighton, why do you ever begin yours?

(1834 – 1903) American-born, British-based artist
Communication Entertainment Insults

Politics makes estranged bedfellows.

(Aiskowitz) (1899 – 1982) humorist
Government Language Politics

[Poker] as elaborate a waste of human intelligence as you could find outside an advertising agency.

(1888 – 1959) detective novelist & screenwriter
Activities Communication Games

Clairvoyant: A person, commonly a woman, who has the power of seeing that which is invisible to her patron, namely, that he is a blockhead.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Communication Definitions Language

A chrysanthemum by any other name would be easier to spell.

author
Communication Language Wordplay

My fellow astronauts…

(1947 – ) U.S. vice president & politician
Communication Misspokements Speech